Waxing

Drunk guy #1: Alright, just saying, if all of us and our friends were chicks, who would get a boob job?
Drunk guy #2: Oh, definitely Mike*. You know, I would definitely say him. He's pretty vain.
(two innings and many beers later)
Drunk guy #1: Alright, if we all were chicks, who'd be clean shaven?
Drunk guy #3: It'd be Steve*. I mean, he already manscapes!

–Shea Stadium

Overheard by: Number 6

Headline by: stephie

Runners-Up:
· “Alright, If We All Were Chicks, What Base Would You Go to With Me?” – Rosie
· “And Which One Would Go Lesbian With Me?” – Meredith
· “And to Answer Your Next Question, Frank Already Does Anal So…..” – I’d shave too.
· “How We Ended Up Giving One Another Head, But Not in a Gay Way” – Rionn Fears Malechem
· “Then Raise Your Beers and Answer Me This, “Who Would Swallow?”” – Bobo D Clown

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

College girl #1: So I think I’ll just get the whole thing waxed, so that the next time I go, it just won’t hurt that much.
College girl #2: I don’t get it.
College girl #1: Like, I’ll be hairy the first time, so it will hurt, and then when I go back, I’ll be like: “Oh, that wasn’t as painful as the first time.”
College girl #2: Shit, shut up! You’re so loud! Now that guy knows you have a hairy vagina.

–Union Square Train Station

Overheard by: the trainman

Is It Stubbleday Already?

Girl: Well, I didn’t shave my armpits this morning.
Guy: Oh.
Girl: Yeah, that was my idea of celebrating!

–12th St & Broadway

Asian boy: So I went on a date with this guy -and this has happened before- he asked me if I shave my arms! And I was like: “No… I’m Asian.”
White girl: Are Asians hairless?

–5 Mott Street

Overheard by: Laura B

Headline by: Toby

Runners-Up:
· “Asians Also Lack a Four-Chambered Heart.” – Matthew
· “Later He Asked Me If I’d Had Penis Reduction Surgery” – Jazz Musician
· “Racism Isn’t Waning – It’s Waxing” – Alchar Haven
· “What Do You Think We Are, Mammals?” – kew
· “Why Anime and Furries Just Don’t Mix!” – GeekGrrl
· “Yes, But We All Buy the Same Wigs” – Melissa
· “Yes, It Makes Us More Aerodynamic So We Breeze Through Those Math Classes.” – JohnnyB

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Stressed guy: But what are you going to do with no hair?!
Stressed girl: I don’t know… Have a baby?

–L Train

Overheard by: Karen

Guy #1: Did I tell you I saw a woman’s pussy on the train today?
Guy #2: Nah, man.
Guy #1: Yeah, this chick sat opposite me in the shortest skirt, and her pussy was just like, BAM! There!
Guy #2: No way! She had no panties?
Guy #1: Of course. She was Hispanic.
Guy #2: Was that shit shaved?
Guy #1: I… uhhh… It was definitely buzzed.

–12th & Washington

Son: Mom, you need your eyebrows waxed!
Mother: Daniel, you’re not supposed to say that!
Son, whining: But you need your eyebrows waxed… You need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed!

–4 train