Ghetto boyfriend: You better shut the fuck up unless you want to get your ass whipped in front of all these White people!
Ghetto girlfriend goes to the next car.
Ghetto boyfriend: But I’m still a G!
–F train
Ghetto boyfriend: You better shut the fuck up unless you want to get your ass whipped in front of all these White people!
Ghetto girlfriend goes to the next car.
Ghetto boyfriend: But I’m still a G!
–F train
Girlfriend: Will you love me forever and ever?
Boyfriend: Yes, even if you broke up with me and shot me and cut me into little bits and set the bits on fire.
Girlfriend: I would never break up with you.
–Central Park
Girlfriend: She fell off her bike and broke all her teeth, so now she has fake ones.
Boyfriend: Well, couldn’t she get white ones? I mean, were they not giving out human teeth that day?
Girlfriend, getting up and hugging him: That’s why I love you.
–Cafe Gitane, Mott & Prince
Overheard by: tea sipper
Man, yelling: I love this woman! I love this woman!
Woman: So where’s the ring?
–51st & 7th
Overheard by: kt
Girlfriend: Spain is an island! With Portugal!
Boyfriend: Look, why do you wanna talk about this?
–Fort Hamilton Parkway, Brooklyn
Overheard by: jcm
Older wife: How did you get these seats?
Older husband: I had to pinch her titties.
Older wife: That must have been fun.
Older husband: As a matter of fact, it was.
–Row D, Lyceum Theatre, 45th & Broadway
Clerk: 20 copies [of ELLE Decor]?
Older man: My Hamptons house is on the cover.
Younger woman: Actually, it’s not his house anymore.
Older man: It’s my ex-wife’s.
Younger woman: Yeah, he traded the house for me!
–Magazine shop, Gramercy
Husband, to wife: In all eyes I am above you. [God] says you must do everything I say without question. If you weren’t pregnant, I wouldn’t even feed you.
–D train
Overheard by: jason
Boyfriend: Oooh, you look pretty in that dress.
Girlfriend: You’re revolting. Don’t touch me.
Queer buddy: Jeremy, this is your stop. Penn Station. Get out.
Boyfriend: No it isn’t. This is 96th Street.
Girlfriend: Do you have any idea how much I hate you? Stop touching me.
–Downtown A train
Overheard by: Shane
Girlfriend: I don’t wanna talk to you.
Boyfriend, chasing after her: How many times must I tell you?! I don’t sleep with guys!!!
–36th & 10th
