Excited college kid #1: Dude! We are totally going back there!
Excited college kid #2: Definitely.
Excited college kid #1: Hash, ‘shrooms, a shitload of pot… We are getting fucked up this weekend and then we’re going back there for more!
Excited college kid #2: Yessssss.
–Bleecker & Sullivan
Overheard by: wondering where there is.
Hot man, in consultative tone: Very underrated how taking a huge dump can improve your day.
Hot woman: Seriously!
Hot man: I have something for you. Something that will change your life. I'm completely serious. Have you ever tried Metamucil?
Hot woman: No.
Hot man: You will take the most massive dumps ever and feel great. It's like weightlifting for your bowels.
–26th & Madison Ave
Girl #1: Hey, if you were dating someone new and then they told you on, like, the third date or whatever that they had genital herpes, would you continue dating them? I mean, like, would you sleep with someone like that?
Girl #2: I don't know. Maybe. I mean, I feel like a lot of people who have herpes don't even know it, so the fact that they told you probably means they're responsible enough to get checked, and they, like, know how to take care of it and everything. In a weird way you may be less likely to get it from them than from someone who never mentions herpes at all.
Girl #1: That's interesting. I think I could do it if, like, I saw myself marrying them. Cause then I wouldn't have to worry about getting it and giving it to someone else. We could just get married, be in love, and be happy together, and grow old with each other, and with herpes.
Girl #2, seriously: That's so romantic.
–American Apparel, Chelsea
Overheard by: Has a different definition of
Girl: Happy 4th of July!
Boyfriend: Why are you so happy about it? You're not American.
Girl: I am too, I was born here!
Boyfriend: I'm waaaay more American than you.
Girl: What, you think Puerto Ricans came over on the Mayflower?
–Union Market, Park Slope
Woman #1, watching drunks sing Redemption Song: What do you think these guys do for a living?
Woman #2: Whatever it is, they're not happy about it.
–Broome St.
Overheard by: Emily B.
Girl to guy: Are you drunk yet?
Guy: No.
Girl: Well, hurry up and get drunk so you can take advantage of me and my friends!
–Columbia University
Frumpy female office worker, hanging up phone: Yes! He just asked me out!
Ordinary female office worker: Are you excited?
Frumpy female office worker: Are you kidding? I feel just like Sadie Hawkins on Sadie Hawkins day!
–Empire St. Bldg office
Overheard by: Tom
Teenage girl: I'm so happy! Nick* friended me on Facebook!
Teenage boy: That's because he was high.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
NYU girl #1: I think he's to good for me. I'm worried.
NYU girl #2: Hey, you should be happy. If I could find a guy like that I'd stop sleeping with strangers. (pause) I did that all last week!
–Outside Silver Center, NYU
Colleague #1: There is a girl in India with four legs.
Colleague #2: She'll be happy. She'll be able to wear more shoes.
Colleague #1: She can run fast.
–Office, Manhattan
