Orange and Raspberry are Fruits, Too

Hobo #1: What flavors you got?
Clerk guy: We have regular, orange, raspberry, and vanilla.
Hobo #1: We’ll take vanilla.
Hobo #2: Vanilla? What are you, gay?

–Nizga Liquors, Avenue A

Overheard by: A. Sterling

Posted on January 28, 2006
Drinking & Drunk People, Hobos, Lower East Side, People

You’re a Real New Yorker When You Don’t

Girl #1: I haven’t seen our homeless guy lately.
Girl #2: We have a homeless guy?
Girl #1: Yeah, the guy who lives on that mattress under our building.
Girl #2: Oh yeah…I hope he’s okay, I haven’t seen him all week.
Girl #1: You know you’re a New Yorker when you worry about where your homeless guy is.

–27th between 5th & Madison

Overheard by: Lauren Lerner

Posted on January 27, 2006
Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, Hobos, Only in New York, People, Union Square and East Village

She Buys It in Bulk

Teen boy: Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, my name is Dwayne and I am in a program that keeps me and other kids like me off the street. They have us sell candy for $1. All profits go directly to the youth program that keeps us off the street. If you would like to purchase Snickers, Twix or Starburst, they are only $1.
Hobo: Hey, lady! Hey, fat lady! Buy some candy. You like candy, don’t you? Fat lady! Get some candy! Get some!
Lady: Asshole.

–6 train

Overheard by: Lydia M

Posted on January 26, 2006
Hobos, Junk Food & Fast Food, On the Subway, Teens, Women

Wednesday One-liners Wear Gross Sneakers

Hobo: Hold the train! I’m just going to go get some sugar for my coffee!

–C train

Overheard by: Jenn B

Posted on January 25, 2006
Coffee, Hobos, On the Subway

She Must Live in Williamsburg

Hobo: I need some money to buy food. Please help a brother out with any change you have.
Little girl: Hey mister, you were just in here.
Hobo: No, I wasn’t. All homeless people don’t look the same, you know!
Little girl: But you all dress the same.

–E train

Overheard by: Nina