Guidette #1: So I called her and she says, “I gotta get off the phone, I’m naked, wet from the shower” and she started mumbling.
Guidette #2: That’s just like her. She’s always naked with something in her mouth.
–Downtown Brooklyn
Overheard by: Koaloha
Girl #1: Is that lady wearing tights, or is she just really pale?
Girl #2: Well, this is just a guess, but most men don’t wear tights.
–Roosevelt Island tram
Overheard by: Julia Kite
Guy #1: All the hipsters in your neighborhood make me want to puke.
Guy #2: I wouldn’t say that too loud, but yeah, I share your sentiment.
Guy #1: What are they going to do? Cough angrily at me?
–St. Marks Place
Overheard by: Lemon
Crazy man: Why do blondes only hang out with other blondes? Why do blondes only hang out with other blonds? Why do blonds only hang out with other blonds?
Chick: Shut up.
Crazy man: Hey Blondie, I wasn’t asking you.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Thompson Patton
Guy: Your breath stinks, get away from me!
Girl: I just woke up. Imagine if the Prince had said that to Snow White? You think her breath smelled so great?
–98th & Columbus
Overheard by: Danielle Harris
Chick #1: A black thong with that skirt, what is she thinking? It’s totally see-through!
Chick #2: Yeah, but who’d want to look?
Chick #1: Oh my god, we are such hateful bitches!
Chick #2: I know!
–15th & 5th
Girl: Mom, how long do you think the turtle will live?
Mother: What do I look like, a fucking turtle connoisseur?
–Canal & West Broadway
Overheard by: David Kopach
Girl #1: She’s such a cranky hobag slut.
Girl #2: I love how we call her “slut” and she’s never even had sex with another cat. Ever.
–Williamsburg coffee shop
Guy #1: You Indian? India is like the next superpower, dude.
Guy #2: Superpower my ass.
–87th & Lexington
Girl #1: …was supposed to be there. You know, from The Golden Girls.
Girl #2: Oh yeah, what happened?
Girl #1: Didn’t show, I hear she’s a real bitch.
Girl #2: Isn’t she like really old now?
Girl #1: She was really old like 25 years ago.
–11th Street & 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Eric
