Little girl in line: I can’t take this anymore. I’m going shopping [walks off to clothing store].
Mother: Whatever.
–Wo Hop restaurant
Overheard by: Cran
Little girl in line: I can’t take this anymore. I’m going shopping [walks off to clothing store].
Mother: Whatever.
–Wo Hop restaurant
Overheard by: Cran
Little boy: Daddy, Daddy! I’m a pickle!
Father: I’m happy for ya, kid, but I need some coffee.
–Deli, Staten Island
Misguided dad: Honey, what’s wrong?
Little girl frantically grabbing at crotch: I… I… I have a bubble and I’m trying to pop it — right here!
Misguided dad, laughing hysterically: Sweetie, that’s just a queef.
–14th & 6th
Grandma: You wanna hear a funny joke?
Boy: Okay.
Grandma: What’s yellow and smells?
Boy: Daddy?
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Hamlet
Little kid: It burns! It burns! [Pauses when a lady tells him to be quiet, then] It burns! It burns! It burns!
–Bx9 bus
Overheard by: Krisztina
Mom: Do you want to watch Over the Hedge when we get home?
Four-year-old boy: Yeah! But we can’t have popcorn. We already had popcorn today and it would be too much salt.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Dahlia
Boy #1: Polar bears don’t melt in water!
Boy #2: Yeah, they do. They swim in it and they disappear.
Boy #1: Wow, really?
–LIRR
Seven-year-old boy holding single color construction paper: Dad, we need to get this.
Father: You’re gonna need more colors than that. There are a lot of planets, and they’re all different colors.
Nine-year-old daughter: Well, we don’t need to worry about Pluto. It’s not a planet anymore.
Father: How can it not be a planet anymore? What, did Superman fly out there and blow it up?
–Michael’s craft store, Northern Blvd, Queens
Seven-year-old girl: What’s your name?
20-something: Uhhh, Katey. What’s yours?
Seven-year-old girl: Liz.
20-something: Okay, how old are you, Liz?
Seven-year-old girl: Seven. How old are you?
20-something: 22.
Seven-year-old girl: You’re old enough to be pregnant!
20-something: … But I’m not!
–M104 bus
Seven-year-old girl: You know what I heard today?
Nine-year-old brother: What?
Seven-year-old girl: Hip hop is dead.
Nine-year-old brother: No, it’s not…
Seven-year-old girl: Nas says it is.
Nine-year-old brother: Hip hop was never alive, beeyotch.
–Pathmark, Eastchester Rd, Bronx
Overheard by: Lukas Page
