Girl: Wait, who's Hitler?
Guy: Are you serious?
Girl: I don't watch a lot of tv…

Peabody, Massachusetts

Dad to five-year-old son: Do you want to get a practice doughnut?

Downyflake Donuts
Nantucket, Massachusetts

Overheard by: we were also practicing before real breakfast

Chick on cell: Yeah, mom, listen: I'm trying to buy some weed. Yeah, I'll call you back if I get any. Okay, love you too. Bye.

Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Adrienne

Burly male student: I hope they’re okay with my nudity. I’m pretty sure I’m nude about 25 percent of the time.

University Student Center
Boston, Massachusetts

60-year-old journalism professor: Oh, the choking game? Heh… I play that all the time.

Emerson College
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Sarah

Teacher, about Thoreau: Who's heard about the cone of silence?
Kid: I know about the cone of shame!

Concord Museum
Concord, Massachusetts

Girl on cell: 'cause I kinda cut off my balls…

Boston Common
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: she didn't look trannyish

Man on cell: What? You calling me fat pussy? I will punch you in the face!

Boston, Massachusetts

Professor, throwing exams on desk the day after taking them: I graded all of these. I want applause.
(class applauds)

Amherst, Massachusetts

Haggard drunk woman to group of drunk men: He says he loves me but won’t even buy me a cupcake!

Boston, Massachusetts