Hipster girl, about shoes: Cool, there’s a cow on the side.
Hipster boy: No, it’s a sheep.
Hipster girl: Oh.
Hipster boy: Well, whatever — it’s bovine.
–Beacon’s Closet, Williamsburg
Overheard by: hipster shopper
Hipster girl, about shoes: Cool, there’s a cow on the side.
Hipster boy: No, it’s a sheep.
Hipster girl: Oh.
Hipster boy: Well, whatever — it’s bovine.
–Beacon’s Closet, Williamsburg
Overheard by: hipster shopper
Biotech #1: Look, there’s that creepy old librarian that used to work at the library at school!
Biotech #2: She was so gross! Every day I would go in to check out a book for a class and another one of her fingers would be missing!
Biotech #1: Yeah, that’s probably why she left.
–Kiehl’s, 3rd Ave
Mother #1: These dolls are so adorable.
Mother #2: Yes, and there’s a wonderful verisimilitude at Target.
–American Girl store, 5th Ave
Overheard by: katicus
Ghetto girl #1: Do these shorts make my ass look huge?
Ghetto girl #2: Girl, your huge ass makes your ass look huge, not those nasty shorts.
–H&M, Broadway & Prince
Overheard by: Aria Grillo
Nerd: So, seriously, where are you from?
Weary Asian hipster girl: Earth.
–Outside Forbidden Planet, 13th & Broadway
Overheard by: can’t wait to use that one
Teen girl #1: I hate these tourists! They’re fucking everywhere!
Teen girl #2, in next stall over: I know!
Teen girl #1: It’s like, ‘Don’t you have the Gap in, like, Kansas or something?’
–Gap dressing room, Times Square
Teen girl #1: I don’t think people understand the gravity of the situation. Nobody seems excited. We’re in an actual Springfield Kwik-E-Mart!
Teen girl #2: I know. When I tell my grandkids I went to a Kwik-E-Mart [trails off]…
–7-Eleven/Kwik-E-Mart near Times Square
Black man: Do you listen to Linkin Park?
Confused LI whitey #1: Ummm, no.
Confused LI whitey #2: He only asked you that ’cause your white.
–Virgin Megastore
Overheard by: Frank T
Mom: I need a size ‘Small.’
Little girl, loudly: Mommy, aren’t you a Large?
–H&M, 51st & 5th
Overheard by: Pooja
Teen step-daughter, looking at skater shoes: I love these shoes! If I saw a guy wearing these shoes, I’d be totally into him.
Suit: Yeah, but not for a 34-year-old.
Teen step-daughter: I know lots of 34-year-olds that would wear these.
Suit: Yeah, they work at the movie theater.
–Vintage clothing store
Overheard by: Sean B
