Mom: We can’t have ice cream. You just had candy at the movie.
Little girl: Mom, you are such a gutter-skank.
Mom, flabbergasted: What did you say?! What did you call me?! Where did you hear that term?!
Little girl: Dad.

Capitol Street
Sacramento, California

Overheard by: Total Gutterskank

Frat boy #1: She was so dumb.
Frat boy #2: You should watch how you use that word. It doesn’t really mean stupid — it really means ‘deaf.’
Frat boy #1: Okay, she was really deaf.

Colorado State University
Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: English Major

Upset 20-something girl: I don't like things where things are things inside of things!

Drexel University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Zywiec

Girl to friend: I can’t believe I fell asleep next to your vagina. I woke up and my face was next to your brick wall. [Kisses friend.] I love your brick wall.

Caribou Coffee
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Bardley

Girl: Shit! I’ve been out of commission for, like, one week and there’s already three new gay words!

Casa dos Artistas Fashion Show
São Paulo

Loudspeaker in airport: Please don't leave your belongings unattended.
Crazy lady, to no one: Did they just say homosexuality isn't allowed in the airport?

Oakland, California

Overheard by: Kristina

Chick: We just have to accept that people are crazy-ass bitches.
Friend: Apparently.

Aurora, Colorado

Overheard by: Leevee

Father: We went to the titty bar all the time when we were in Canada.
20-ish daughter: I wish you wouldn’t use the word ‘titty.’
Father: Why not? Titty, titty, titty. Titty, titty, titty.
20-ish daughter: Cock, cunt, pussy, balls, dick.
Father: Point proven.


Overheard by: JPatrick

Student to friend: When she painted the banana, or vice-versa.

Colby-Sawyer College
New Hampshire

Overheard by: J.McC

Drunk girl #1, in bathroom: So I told her she just needed to remove her vagina, put on a cock and man up!
Drunk girl #2: Totally.

Bathroom, Rocket Bar
Washington, DC