Eavesdrop DC

Son to father, exiting hospital: Dad, what's a disability?
Father: It's like when someone loses their finger in an accident, (pause) which will probably happen to you.


Overheard by: Jon

Guy: That's a cool necklace. What is it?
Girl: Oh, it's Lady Liberty. I'm a libertarian.
Guy: Oh cool. I'm a Virgo.


Overheard by: student

Girl: Why do they have an ambassador to Vatican City?
Guy: Because it’s a country and stuff.
Girl: Do, like, normal people live there?
Guy: I don’t know…
Girl, thoughtfully: It’s a scary place…


Overheard by:

Suit #1: So you live in the Watergate.
Suit #2: I do. The famous Watergate complex.
Suit #1: It's famous?
Suit #2: Yeah–the Nixon scandal and everything.
Suit #1: Oh–I don't really follow current events.


Dude #1: I have a really bad headache.
Dude #2: You know what cures that? Sodomy!


Middle-aged wife: Oh, honey, look! It's the George Jefferson memorial.
Middle-aged husband: Seriously. You are such an idiot.


Guy #1: ‘Drinking the Kool-Aid’ is such a misused phrase. It’s even become corporate speak. Don’t people realize that it’s a reference to the death of a thousand people?
Guy #2: Yeah, next thing you know they’ll be saying, ‘We’re going to offer a Holocaust of savings.’


Girl #1: What? Did he think I was going to let him have sex with me?
Girl #2: Or choke you?


Overheard by: Marty

Professor: I have three children: 15, 13, and 7.
Female student: Oh, I don't think I could have three.
Male student: Yeah, with two you can do person-on-person defense, but with three you need zone.
professor: You have a point.


Overheard by: Ian

20-something to gay friend: I got stuffed more than a Turducken last night!