Guy #1: Did you watch your Pee Wee’s Playhouse last night?
Guy #2: It didn’t come!
–27th Street office
Guy #1: Did you watch your Pee Wee’s Playhouse last night?
Guy #2: It didn’t come!
–27th Street office
Cheryl: I can’t believe he called me a bitch in a meeting with all of those people! I didn’t know what to do!
Bitch: Cheryl, being called a bitch isn’t an insult; it’s applause. It means he didn’t have anything really bad to say.
–23rd Street F station
Girl #1: So you have a hot gyno?
Girl #2: No, he’s just my regular doctor.
Girl #1: Oh.
Girl #2: Yeah.
–Art Bar, 8th Avenue
Guy #1: Hit him in the fucking head.
Guy #2: Fuck him in the head.
Guy #1: Yo, that’s mad homoerotic, son.
–St. Mark’s Ale House, St. Mark’s Place
Overheard by: Eric
Teen #1: Damn, kid! Your face mad hairy!
Teen #2: I’m a grown-ass man, dog.
–A train
Chick #1: You know what the best orgasm I ever had was? I jerked off with my mom’s jewelry in frount of the mirror. I liked watching it go in and out and thinking that she was going to be wearing it later.
Chicl #2: Oh god! Did you wash it after?
–Bally’s, Bensonhurst
Overheard by: Deborah Olin
Woman #1: So it was great to see you again!
Woman #2: I know, you too!
Woman #1: Now I forgot, where are you going on vacation again?
Woman #2: Oh, just up to Vermont. We’re going to see a psychiatrist.
–Broadway and Waverly
Boy: My top scary movie of all time is The Shining.
Girl: Oh my god you guys, the scariest movie I have ever seen is Event Horizon.
–Williamsburg
Guy: How about The Black Market Babies?
Girl: The Black Market Babies?
Guy: The thing is, there’s already a band called The Backyard Babies. If you know anything about The Backyard Babies, you wouldn’t want to be associated with them.
Girl: Isn’t that who Dana dated?
Guy: No. I got her backstage to meet him. She’s in the dressing room; I used my radio credentials to get her in. He was all ready to make a move and then he started vomiting! That’s when I met Joey Ramone. I was going to complain to Joey but he died shortly after.
–D train
Guy: I saw that movie Hide and Seek. It sucked.
Girl: I don’t know that one. Who’s in it?
Guy: Ummm…that guy from Meet the Fockers.
Girl: …Ben Stiller?
Guy: Who?
Girl: Are you talking about Ben Stiller?
Guy: No, no, the old guy.
Girl: Robert DeNiro?!
Guy: Yeah, him.
Girl: You call Robert DeNiro “that guy from Meet the Fockers“?!
–1 train
Overheard by: Brian J. Heck
