Man with facial hair: You can only really pull off a Fu Man Chu if you’re a cop, a gay porn star, or a pirate.
–Virgin Records, Times Square
Guy to his girlfriend: You are one hairy bastard
–78th & 1st
Man with facial hair: You can only really pull off a Fu Man Chu if you’re a cop, a gay porn star, or a pirate.
–Virgin Records, Times Square
Guy to his girlfriend: You are one hairy bastard
–78th & 1st
Puerto Rican teenager hanging with his homies: Yo GIMME YOUR BIKE!
Hipster riding by on his BMX: Gimme your haircut! I like your crispy hairlines!
–Grand & Havemayer
Overheard by: lil pirate
Eva Amurri to hipster companion: My father was telling me the dangers of aspartame — you know the stuff in Diet Coke? It’s like a sugar. It was once registered as a chemical weapon.
Hipster companion: Yeah?
Eva Amurri: If there is any way to become a superhero, it has to be by drinking Diet Coke.
[later]
Eva Amurri to hipster companion: I can’t remember how it ends… If he dies in a war or if Gatsby gets in a car crash, but he loves Daisy.
[later still]
Eva Amurri: Pasties are Band-Aids that only cover your nipples.
–Acela train leaving Penn Station
Overheard by: could you maybe namedrop your mom less, Miss Top-Volume-At-All-Times?
Hipster chick #1: I wish they had a whole pizza made of crust. I would so buy it.
Hipster chick #2: Me, too!
Queer: You mean bread?
–Pino’s La Forchetta, Park Slope
Hipster girl #1: Why would someone tell you that right after meeting you?
Hipster girl #2: Honestly, why can’t you just say your favorite movie is The Lord of the Rings instead of Lord of the Rings porn?
–Bedford & South 2nd, Williamsburg
Older black gentleman in suit: Hey man, can you help me out?
Arab guy in limo smiles and says nothing.
Black man: I’m, uh, I’m lookin’ for someone to go home with tonight. ‘Cause I’m a gay guy, see. Well, I mean, I’m kind of a swing guy. I like to, uh… ascend to different levels.
Hipster guy walking past: What is it, like, a video game?
Black guy: Yeah! Yeah, baby, it’s a video game. ‘Cept when I win… I fuck you.
–44th & 6th
Overheard by: Peebs
Hipster girl #1: Oooh. She’s all Chinese and thinks she’s cute. I hate her.
Hipster girl #2: Actually, she’s Japanese. I’m pretty sure there’s a difference.
Hipster girl #1: Yeah, the price of the food.
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: Amber Lowery
Hipster with small dog: I used to be in the Navy. What is your training?
Sailor: I’ll be on a sub, learning to shoot nuclear warheads.
Hipster: Shit man, that’s intense.
Sailor: I know, I’m not really into violence.
–Stanton & Ludlow
Overheard by: Dan Levin
Hipster chick: Why are you lying on the ground?
Drunk Peruvian starts doing pelvic thrusts.
Hipster chick: Are you talking to me with your crotch?
–Bowery Ballroom
Overheard by: Siegal
Rocker doof #1: Dude we’re having this flannel party. We’re totally going to like put on Neil Young and CCR videos and shit.
Rocker doof #2: Dude I saw this movie Hype about like grunge or whatever and everyone was wearing flannel… but it totally wasn’t ironic!
–art opening, Kent & Metropolitan, Williamsburg
