Girl: We aren’t underground, are we?
Guy: Look over there; there’s the sun.
–2 train
Overheard by: Wally
Girl: We aren’t underground, are we?
Guy: Look over there; there’s the sun.
–2 train
Overheard by: Wally
Drunk girl #1: Oh my God I so know what you are talking about! Wait, you guys were talking about anal sex right?
Drunk girl #2: Uh no, we stopped talking about guys ten minutes ago.
–Red Sky, E. 29th Street
Man to coworker: Yeah, sometimes we hike up to mount Kilimanjaro in the summertime.
Stupid woman: Oh, mount Kilimanjaro…is that in Vermont?
Man (taken aback): Uh, actually, it's in Tanzania.
Stupid woman: Where is that?
–1221 Avenue of the Americas
Headline by: k swin
Runners-Up:
· “It’s Considered the Vermont Of Africa, If That Helps” – mac
· “It’s Next to “The Iraq”, Like Such As… Uh…” – Virginia
· “It’s Southwest Of Vermont” – Edmund H.
· “Oh, Like Any Of You Can Point It Out on a Map?” – Natty
· “President Obama Is Still Weeding Out Bush’s Staff….” – kim
Asian girl: That reminds me of those dogs that have to wear the cones around their neck.
Asian boy: What’s that for, anyway? To project the bark?
–Port Authority
Overheard by: DA
Brainiac: Maybe AIDS wouldn’t be such a problem in Africa if they’d stop buttfucking each other so much.
–Midtown office
Bimbette art student #1, pointing at fresh grapes: I don’t get why they call ‘olive-skinned’ people ‘olive-skinned’. No one’s skin is that color!
Bimbette art student #2, after closer inspection of fresh grapes: Yeah, but those olives look messed up, I think they’re fake. Real olives are, like, darker or something.
Bimbette art student #1: Yeah, those olives are too light, that’s it. No one’s skin is that color of… of light green.
Cashier: Uhm, are you ladies in line? Can I get you some… Grapes?
Bimbette art student #3: Yeah, those olives are totally fake, that must be it.
[Group leaves deli.]Cashier: Did that really just happen?
–27th & 5th
Girl #1: I don’t feel well.
Girl #2: You look fine.
Girl #1: I think I have malaria.
Girl #2: I really don’t think you do.
Girl #1: Do people get malaria in Nicaragua?
Girl #2: I don’t know, I don’t care, and furthermore, we were in Brazil.
–JFK
Guy #1: Isn’t that festival around here somewhere?
Guy #2: Yeah, it’s down that way. What do they call it?
Guy #1: Cinco DiMaggio.
–Mott & Spring
Overheard by: Cryptonomic B
Guy: They’re George Strait jeans.
Girl: I love George Strait. He’s a hottie.
Guy: He only gives his name to the best.
Girl: Didn’t he give his name to that tractor place?
Guy: It must have been the best tractor.
–NYU Law commons area, W. 3rd St.
Overheard by: Micah Prude
Girl: This can’t be good. It says ‘Phenylketonurics: Contains phenylalanine.’
Guy #1: Isn’t that a vegetable?
Guy #2: No, it’s okay. It’s Italian.
–3 train
Overheard by: Jessica
