Old man #1: Do you know why a bunny is connected to Easter?
Old man #2: No.
Old man #1: It’s because Easter is about fertility and rabbits are animals that are always copulating.
Old man #2: Huh, I never heard about that.
Old man #1: Think about it. On Easter, you have the bunnies and the bunnies have eggs and the eggs have children in them.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Amanda Matteis
Little boy #1: Do you live on the Upper West Side?
Little boy #2: Well, technically yes and technically no.
Little boy #1: Okay, see you tomorrow.
–85th & Amsterdam
Crazy woman: What? Yes, send me the numbers, I’ll help you with the numbers.
Med chick: Oh, excuse me. I’m sorry.
Crazy woman: You dont have to be sorry, but if you want to make it up to me, make me some General Tso chicken and a pu pu platter…Why didn’t you call me? By the way, who the fuck is Milstein?
–Milstein Hospital, Fort Washington Avenue
Little boy: Huge ass.
Woman: What?
Little boy: Huge ass!
–79th Street 1 station
Little boy: Mommy, you should try Black Swan.
Mom: Why don’t you be quiet for a little bit?
–PJ Liquor Warehouse, 207th & Broadway
Overheard by: Andy Hobin
Guy: But you’re my Asian…
Girl: I don’t know. You haven’t been feeding me lately.
Guy: You’re not a Tamagatchi!
Girl: Maybe I am.
–Tisch School of the Arts, Broadway & Waverly
Overheard by: Dan O’Connor
Girl #1: I can’t believe you hang out with that guy…All of your friends are such losers!
Girl #2: Well, I hang out with you, don’t I?
Girl #1: I think that proves my point more than it does yours.
–77th & Columbus
Chick #1: Well most of your friends are losers anyway. Who cares what they do?
Chick #2: No, one of them’s engaged.
–F train
Overheard by: Kira
Guy: You know whose coochie smells? Don’t take this the wrong way: white girls. White girls’ coochie always smells nasty. Every white girl I been with, their coochie is stank.
Chick: You know why? It’s ’cause white girls live far from the ghetto, and they have a longass train ride to get to the ghetto, and by the time they get to your house in the ghetto, they sweating and waiting and their coochie stinks.
–40th between 7th & 8th
Overheard by: cherie
Crazy guy: I give you Jesus!
Blind man: Is that Mel Gibson? You nitwit!
–97th & Broadway
Suit: When you’re 25 and you measure your hourly rate in three digits it takes a hell of a lot of grief to not make it worthwhile.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Gabriel Stempinski
