Queer: This place is way gayer than last time.
–XL, West 16th street
Overheard by: straight girl
Queer: This place is way gayer than last time.
–XL, West 16th street
Overheard by: straight girl
Dude: I’ve fired 3 people in the last 2 weeks. One girl was fat. But she didn’t know it. She would come into work with her belly falling out of her shirt. I just couldn’t take it anymore.
–NYSC, 38th & Broadway
Overheard by: Aimee
Woman: I’m never going to be in the “in crowd” because the “in crowd” are all molecular biologists and have labs.
–F train
Overheard by: Eric Wrenn
Teacher lady: Kids, kids…Quiet! Remember, no one else on this train likes children!
–F train
Overheard by: Erin Schulte
Yuppie lady: Excuse me! I’ve been calling for someone and waiting in aisle 2 for ten minutes, and no one came! This is ridiculous! You people are incompetent! You have things stacked so they fall! Look at my pants!
Black woman: …So why are you telling me?
Yuppie lady: Because you work here!
Black woman: No, lady…I don’t.
–Gristedes, West 64th Street
Overheard by: vegannramember
Salesguy #1: If you could take over any country which one would you pick?
Salesguy #2: What do you mean, “take over”?
Salesguy #1: You know, weapons, resources, control the army, stuff like that.
Salesguy #2: That’s a hard question. I mean, I’m not that well traveled. People are so different in every country, different cultures.
Salesguy #1: Well, what if you could spend a year there, get to know the place?
–Bloomingdale’s, 59th & 3rd
Overheard by: Doug Tebay
Guy #1: I stayed the night at her place and woke early. She was still asleep.
Guy #2: What did you do?
Guy #1: I got up and was going to make myself breakfast. But when I cracked the egg open it got away from me.
Guy #2: Where did it go?
Guy #1: It slid down a crack between the counter and the stove.
Guy #2: What did you do?
Guy #1: I put everything away and climbed back into bed.
Guy #2: You know that shit is going to stink!
Guy #1: Yeah, I’m sure it will.
–97th & Broadway
Lady: Naw. This quarter say Pennsylvania on the back.
McChick: Yes, ma’am. It’s a commemorative quarter.
Lady: Yeah. But it say Pennsylvania. See?
McChick: Yes. Those are the new quarters.
Lady: All right. But if I find out I can’t spend this, I’m bringin’ it back in here.
–McDonalds, 23rd & Madison
Overheard by: Will McLaughlin
Chick: Yeah, our RA put up this poster listing these words we’re not
supposed to say because they’re offensive.
Guy: What can’t you say?
Chick: “Bitch”, “retarded”, “gay”, “fag”, “slut”, and “gypped”.
Guy: “Gypped”? Why “gypped”?
Chick: I dunno, it’s offensive to gypsies or something.
Guy: Do gypsies even go to NYU, let alone college?
Chick: Maybe she’s from Romania and shit.
–Hayden Hall Residence, Washington Square West
Overheard by: Glynnis O
Little boy: Mom, is South America a continent?
Mom: Well, it’s…there’s North America and South America.
Little boy: Yeah, is South America a continent?
Mom: Uh, no. No, it’s not a continent, it’s…Um…
–St. Marks Place
