A teen girl punches her father repeatedly in the arm.
Older sister: You know he can’t feel that, right? He’s wearing a leather jacket.
Teen girl: What?
Older sister: Yeah, that’s why motorcyclists wear leather, so they don’t get their skin scraped off when they go sliding across the pavement.
Teen girl: Oh! So if I punch a cow, it can’t feel it?
–The Plaza
Dad: Ok, ok, it’s two outs, we’ll go after this batter.
Boy: Dad, I want water!
Dad: You know what I see? An impatient little boy who can’t wait five minutes.
Boy: You know what I see? Someone who’s gonna have their face broken because they didn’t have any water!
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Becka Dash
Barfly: It was a term of endearment.
Bouncer: A term of endearment is not punching someone in the face.
–2×4, 2nd Ave & 4th St
Overheard by: Cait O’Connor (and Foley)
Headline by: Dave Barnette
Runners-Up:
· “And Assault Isn’t A Spice, Either” – Kathy
· “Aww, you just feel left out.” – Alaine
· “He Said He Wanted Another Hit” – Playtah
· “He’s playing hard to get” – Jeri Rosenblum
· “C’mon, it’s not like she was pregnant…” – laura c
· “It doesn’t count if you don’t leave a mark.” – Scott
· “Welcome to New York” – shorty
· “Another dropout from the school of hard knocks” – jm
· “Barflies Mate Every 48 Hours” – red
· “No, That’s a Term of Three To Ten” – Boyhowdy
· “Dad has a lot of explaining to do” – Mr. Uncreative
· “For endearment, you tend to go for the groin” – ruth
· “Tyler Durden: The Final Years” – Mr. Nobody
· “Punchline” – Robert Katz
Middle-aged Latino woman to younger black woman: Listen, I got rights, ok? I mean I’ll do the time for it, I don’t care. On this train you gotta give people respect, ’cause everyone’s a person. You give ’em respect, then you punch ’em.
–M train
Twentysomething girl on cell: Because I beat the crap out of him, that’s why I got fired.
–Continental Ave & Austin St, Forest Hills
Overheard by: Sean Finnerty
Girl on cell: What, did she say she thought I was going to hit her or something?…There was a customer there!
–Broadway & 70th
Overheard by: Vanessa Robinson
Girl: Well, tell Joe my fist has a suggestion for his face.
–Fordham University, Rose Hill
Overheard by: Jess McGins
