Girl #1: She’s so lucky. I mean, she works for Oscar de la Renta.
Girl #2: Yeah, and she has a clause in her pre-nup that allows her husband to divorce her if her feet become disgusting. I’m jealous.
–Fashion Ave. elevator
Girl #1: She’s so lucky. I mean, she works for Oscar de la Renta.
Girl #2: Yeah, and she has a clause in her pre-nup that allows her husband to divorce her if her feet become disgusting. I’m jealous.
–Fashion Ave. elevator
Drunk: I want a bag of cocaine…a bag of cocaine and two lesbians.
Girlfriend: You’re not going to get it.
Drunk: Which, the bag of cocaine or the two lesbians?
Girlfriend: Neither.
Drunk: Fuck you!
Girlfriend: What, am I not good enough for you?
–1st Ave. & 5th St.
Overheard by: Alexander Romanovich
Bus driver, to guy entering bus: Sorry, ladies only.
–45th & 5th
Overheard by: Jobee
Tranny: Girl, you gotta keep that penis.
–Midtown
Chick on cell: I like the idea of having a penis.
–Harlem
Overheard by: hott bi luvr
Woman: Unless they’re gay, in which case you should just pretend I said men instead of girls. But it’s all still true.
–47th & 8th
Man on cell: Everyone is asking me if I’m a lesbian this week. What is that about?
–Christopher & Bedford
Overheard by: staso
Woman to co-worker: So he has all girls as daughters.
–225 Broadway, 4th floor
Overheard by: Jennifer
Queer: God, I either need to fuck a boy or a trannie tonight!
–13th & Broadway
Overheard by: liza
Chatty, obnoxious girl #1: My last relationship was a disaster. He just didn't treat me well. He was very disrespectful. How is your man doing?
Chatty, obnoxious girl #2: I don't know. He says he loves me, takes me out all the time, is always calling and paying for everything. He even writes me long romantic notes and spends time with me whenever he can. It's just kind of lame, you know? I just told him I loved him to shut him up.
–E Train
Overheard by: Xander
NYU girl: So, how did your date go with Hank?
NYU girl #2: You know how most girls, when they meet a guy they really like, start thinking about marriage, a picket fence, and having two kids? Well, when I meet a guy I like, I think about how we’ll start dating, he’ll cheat on me, and we’ll break up. Then I’ll have wasted two years of my life.
–NYU Library
Blonde coed: After he finished yelling at me for a solid ten minutes, he's like, "So, do you want to be my girlfriend?"
–3rd Ave & 11th St
Overheard by: simon
Middle school girl to boy: I don't normally get with sixth graders, but you're different…
–10th St & 1st Ave
Woman on cell: You are not listening to me. (pause) When you say whatever it is you're bitching about', I know that you are not actually listening to me.
–Riverside Park
Guy on cell: I don't treat you quite as bad as you say.
–Amtrak
Overheard by: Flooey
Boyfriend, about girlfriend enthusiastically cheering on Colbert: Why don't you scream like that for me?
–The Colbert Report Set
Party girl to friend: So I asked my priest, and he said "I think you should see other people."
–Park Ave & 29th St
Overheard by: petey
Man #1: She’s got a kid, and I want no part of that. But I like her a lot…
Man #2: Right.
Man #1: I mean, she’s not that attractive, you know, but she has a nice ass.
–3 train
Overheard by: rat
Guy: I can understand her sleeping with my best friend on my couch and all…
Girl: But the falling in love thing? That’s just rude!
–Union Square Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: suzz
Girl: …yeah, I can’t wait. He is kinda cute.
Guy: Oh yeah?
Girl: Yeah, in a sort of “fuck me hard, fuck me now” kind of way. But that’s what I’m looking for right now.
20 min. later:
Guy: I really like him. He is a good guy.
Girl: He’s an alcoholic and insane! He’s great though, I like him too.
–2 train
Chick: I just have to go home and masturbate tonight. An orgasm would feel so good right now.
–42nd Street station
Overheard by: The Original Danger
Spanish dude: Yeah, she left me a message and it was like, “Oh, I see you ain’t answering your phone and shit ’cause you doin’ what you do…but that’s ai’ight, I’m a do me.” So I called her, I was like, “What you doin’ you? Matta fact, did you do you already? You gon’ go out and fuck somebody else because I couldn’t pick up my phone?”. And she was like, “Nah, nooo, I didn’t mean it, I was just mad. And then you got that other bitch.” I said, “I’m not concerned about that bitch, I’m concerned about this bitch.”
–A train