Relationships

Big booty girl #1: Bubble Boy. I love that movie.
Big booty girl #2: Yeah me, too.
Big booty girl #1: No, I really love that movie.
Big booty girl #2: Yeah, it’s funny.
Big booty girl #1: That used to be my ex-boyfriend and me’s movie…but that’s not why I love it.

–Times Square

Ho: …no, really. Like, I have really been trying to win his trust back. I’ve been doing everything! I even deleted all my ex-boyfriends’ screen names from all my IM accounts, right in front of him! I don’t know what else I could do to make him trust me again…

–Lehman College

Overheard by: Soro

Girl #1: She’s so lucky. I mean, she works for Oscar de la Renta.
Girl #2: Yeah, and she has a clause in her pre-nup that allows her husband to divorce her if her feet become disgusting. I’m jealous.

–Fashion Ave. elevator

Drunk: I want a bag of cocaine…a bag of cocaine and two lesbians.
Girlfriend: You’re not going to get it.
Drunk: Which, the bag of cocaine or the two lesbians?
Girlfriend: Neither.
Drunk: Fuck you!
Girlfriend: What, am I not good enough for you?

–1st Ave. & 5th St.

Overheard by: Alexander Romanovich

Bus driver, to guy entering bus: Sorry, ladies only.

–45th & 5th

Overheard by: Jobee

Tranny: Girl, you gotta keep that penis.

–Midtown

Chick on cell: I like the idea of having a penis.

–Harlem

Overheard by: hott bi luvr

Woman: Unless they’re gay, in which case you should just pretend I said men instead of girls. But it’s all still true.

–47th & 8th

Man on cell: Everyone is asking me if I’m a lesbian this week. What is that about?

–Christopher & Bedford

Overheard by: staso

Woman to co-worker: So he has all girls as daughters.

–225 Broadway, 4th floor

Overheard by: Jennifer

Queer: God, I either need to fuck a boy or a trannie tonight!

–13th & Broadway

Overheard by: liza

Chatty, obnoxious girl #1: My last relationship was a disaster. He just didn't treat me well. He was very disrespectful. How is your man doing?
Chatty, obnoxious girl #2: I don't know. He says he loves me, takes me out all the time, is always calling and paying for everything. He even writes me long romantic notes and spends time with me whenever he can. It's just kind of lame, you know? I just told him I loved him to shut him up.

–E Train

Overheard by: Xander

NYU girl: So, how did your date go with Hank?
NYU girl #2: You know how most girls, when they meet a guy they really like, start thinking about marriage, a picket fence, and having two kids? Well, when I meet a guy I like, I think about how we’ll start dating, he’ll cheat on me, and we’ll break up. Then I’ll have wasted two years of my life.

–NYU Library

Blonde coed: After he finished yelling at me for a solid ten minutes, he's like, "So, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

–3rd Ave & 11th St

Overheard by: simon

Middle school girl to boy: I don't normally get with sixth graders, but you're different…

–10th St & 1st Ave

Woman on cell: You are not listening to me. (pause) When you say whatever it is you're bitching about', I know that you are not actually listening to me.

–Riverside Park

Guy on cell: I don't treat you quite as bad as you say.

–Amtrak

Overheard by: Flooey

Boyfriend, about girlfriend enthusiastically cheering on Colbert: Why don't you scream like that for me?

–The Colbert Report Set

Party girl to friend: So I asked my priest, and he said "I think you should see other people."

–Park Ave & 29th St

Overheard by: petey

Man #1: She’s got a kid, and I want no part of that. But I like her a lot…
Man #2: Right.
Man #1: I mean, she’s not that attractive, you know, but she has a nice ass.

–3 train

Overheard by: rat

Guy: I can understand her sleeping with my best friend on my couch and all…
Girl: But the falling in love thing? That’s just rude!

–Union Square Barnes & Noble

Overheard by: suzz