Relationships

Man gassing up his pickup truck to screaming woman inside: Goddammit, Delores, I cannot unfuck that woman!

Gas Station, Alabama

Girlfriend on packed, stopped train: I'm bored. Tell me a story.
Boyfriend: I remember the first time I saw you…you were crying…sitting outside the abortion clinic. I gave you my hankie.

Yellow Train
Washington, DC

Overheard by: entertained next to them

Loud girl on cell: Don't you think he might just be settling for you because he don't have no other choice? (pause) What I mean is, he's only marrying you because he can't find no one better? (pause) This is what I'm talkin' about. You don't know nothing. He don't want to marry you. He just is cause he ain't got nothing better to do. (pause) Yes, I am serious. Don't take that tone with me. I know what I'm talkin' about!

King of Prussia, Pennsylvania

Drunk girl: Oh! So you're not going to go home with your girlfriend when she is asking you and her roommate isn't even home! Oh! Oh! (boyfriend whispers something to her) I don't care if I'm on my period or not!

University of Dayton
Dayton, Ohio

35-year-old man: Do you know what I did for you? I left my home, my wife. I cheated because I was cheated on, I know what that's like. You're turning 30, you need a man, what's a woman at 30? You're alone!
28-year-old woman: You're having a midlife crisis. Women don't get those. I'm there for you, like, “you should stop at three drinks because you're a terrible drunk.”
35-year-old man: You'd do that for me?

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Matt

Male mountain biker: All we ever did was make out. And that's not what I want in a relationship. If I wanted a hook-up buddy I'd at least get one who would suck my dick. I mean, there's like 14 girls I could go to right now. So that's why I broke up with her.
Female mountain biker: Yeah… She was pretty straightforward though, wasn't she?

Crafton Hills, California

Overheard by: they didn't even notice I was wearing hiking in slippers

Girl to friends: I mean, if you’re talking about who he’s technically going out with, then she’s the girlfriend and I’m the other woman. But, I mean… If you’re talking about who he confides in more, I’m the girlfriend and she’s the other woman.

Dobbs Ferry, New York

Overheard by: Lex

Drunk JAP, yelling at boyfriend: I can't deal with your shit anymore! You don't respect me, you ridicule me in front of my friends. You tell me my dog doesn't deserve to live in a house as big as mine! I don't want to live like this!

Long Island, New York

Overheard by: Jill and Weenie

Woman on phone, sobbing and screaming: We have two beautiful children, and you want to stick your dick in someone else?

Disneyland
Anaheim, California

Professor: And so then after he killed the beast he went and bathed because there was dirt under his fingernails and a civilized man never has dirty fingernails… (pauses) My first girlfriend dumped me for dirty fingernails.

York University
Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Student