Man on cell: Hello. Oh, hi, yes. You won’t believe it. I’m on a bus. In New York City. Can you imagine?
–M-104 bus
Overheard by: Nhoo
Girl: Oh my God, I am psyched to be in New York. Look! I can’t believe they have sand here! Aww!
–Central Park, near the Great Lawn
Tourist guy: Wow. I love this city. If New York had a cunt, I would eat it.
–Times Square
Overheard by: monzo
Tourist: Um, do you live here?
Teen girl: Uh, yeah.
Tourist: Oh, is that the Empire State Building?
Teen girl: You mean the big, pointy building?
Tourist: [nods]Teen girl: What the fuck do you think? [walks away] Fucking tourist.
Tourist: Thank you! [to friend] So, wait, is it the Empire State Building?
–near Union Square
Six young guys are trying to check into the Hotel Chelsea late on Saturday night of Pride Weekend.
Desk clerk: Two beds for four men, not six! Not six men for two beds. [Pause] That’s a different hotel!
–Hotel Chelsea, W. 23rd St
Tourist guy: …Huh. What religion are you, anyway?
Hasidic guy: Um…I’m Jewish.
Tourist guy: Oh. Do you like America?
–L train
