British hipster: Is that your feet I smell?
British bimbo: No, it’s my fuckin’ pussy!
–Duane Reade, 2nd St & Ave B
British hipster: Is that your feet I smell?
British bimbo: No, it’s my fuckin’ pussy!
–Duane Reade, 2nd St & Ave B
Girl #1: Oh my god, I just thought of something so cool!
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Women are like magicians!
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: They pull bunnies out of hats, and we can pull babies out of our vaginas!
Girl #2: Wow, you’re so smart!
Girl #1: I know, right?
–Apple Store
Boy: Mommy, what’s a vah-jay-jay?
Mom: A bird, sweetie! A wonderful bird.
–Wall St
Hipster chick: [Whispering]… Vagina. [Whispering]… Vagina. [Whispering]… Haha, vagina!
Six people collectively: Shut up!
Four-year-old boy: Mom, what’s a vagina?
Mom: It’s a word that only fucking inconsiderate people say around four-year-olds.
Four-year-old: Mom, what’s ‘fucking’?
–A train
Overheard by: Alex Gherardi aka Booger
Girl #1: Britney really needs to stop showing her hoo-ha all over Hollywood.
Girl #2: Seriously. If I see one more picture of her vag, I’ll vomit.
Girl #1: What, her mother didn’t teach her to put on panties?
Girl #2: Or get out of a car without showing her cooter?
Girl #3: I was on Perez Hilton dot com the other day, and they fully had pictures of her in all her glory.
Girl #2: Oh my god, was it bald? I heard it actually looked nice and neat.
Girl #3: Yeah, I guess it was okay. One of the nicer ones I’ve seen.
Guy at next table on cell: What? … Oh, sorry honey. No, I’m paying attention to you. I’m just at Starbucks, and some girls were, uh… talking really loud at the next table.
–Starbucks, Union Square
Girl #1: Have you ever had a ‘sandy eggo’?
Girl #2: Ummm… What’s that?
Girl #1: Just guess from the name!
Girl #2: Uh… A whale’s vagina?
–1 train
Homely chick walks by in black tights and midriff-baring shirt, gut hanging out.
Construction worker #1, wide-eyed: Wow!
Construction worker #2: No! Camel toe!
–57th & 7th
Overheard by: Just going to work
Guy: What’s so funny? Vagina? I’m not scared to say ‘vagina,’ watch: Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina!
–Grand Army Plaza
Columbia student: Do strippers use their vaginas?
–Massawa Ethiopian, 120th & Amsterdam
Girl wearing jerz shirt: Guys, if I zipped my pussy, of course I would tell you.
–27th St
Middle school boy to another: Do you know what a ‘cunt’ is? It’s a pussy. [Pause] You should know that, it’s Jamaican.
–B69 bus
Overheard by: Bilingual
Guy standing in pile of luggage outside women’s restroom: Man, I’m glad my vagina’s not with me today.
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: A Vagina
40-something preggers: So my mother insisted on coming into the room when I had my last pelvic exam.
Other patient: Seriously?
40-something preggers: What’s worse is that she was standing near the doctor while he was doing the exam. She was watching.
Other patient: What? No way!
40-something preggers: Then she said to the doctor, ‘Can I hold something for you?’
–Gynecologist’s office, Manhattan
Girl #1: So, he told me that I had the prettiest pussy he had ever seen.
Girl #2: Ew! What did you say?
Girl #1: I said, ‘Thank you.’ My mother told me to always take a compliment gracefully.
–Prince & Broadway
