Girl #1: I love masturbating.
Girl #2: Yeah, I totally love touching my vagina!
–Sultana Hookah Bar
Overheard by: rich
Girl #1: I love masturbating.
Girl #2: Yeah, I totally love touching my vagina!
–Sultana Hookah Bar
Overheard by: rich
Guy: Where do you keep your pussy enhancer?
Girl: On the shelf, under my Pee-wee Herman doll.
–160th St & Malcolm X
Overheard by: Hanz Shnrub
Girlfriend: My shoes are killing me.
Boyfriend: If you don't stop I'll have to punch you in the cunt.
Girlfriend: Would you even know where to find it?
–East Village
Overheard by: C
Girl: I have to pee sooooo bad!
Mother: You just went to the bathroom ten minutes ago.
Girl: But I have to pee again! Can you put something in my vagina to hold it up?
–M104 Bus
Girl to male friend: I mean, they were both lousy lovers, but when it came right down to it her vagina was just too wide.
–110th & Broadway
Ghetto teen: Yo, girl! Don’t be pickin’ at yo’ pussy like that in the street! You’ll be on YouTube tomorrow!
–South St Seaport
Overheard by: Big Larry
JAP: I don’t understand how a baby just fell out of her vagina and she didn’t feel anything!
–Outside Lafayette St dorm, NYU
Overheard by: Philouza
Girl on cell: I fully support the idea of a vagina factory.
–7th St & Bedford Ave
Overheard by: Liam Cubbin
Bimbette: Tiff, do these make my vagina look furry?
–Dressing room, Macy’s
Overheard by: SarahM
Chick: My vagina seems so crooked today…
–23rd & 5th
Overheard by: Bruce
Girl on cell: No! He was seriously, like, drilling for oil or something. My vagina is not a source of fossil fuel!
–Central Park
Overheard by: But it’d be cool if it were
10-year-old girl in school uniform: Ew! You mean you'd still go through with it?
10-year-old boy in school uniform: Yeah! At least she'd still have a vagina!
–Park Ave & 79th St
Lawyer #1: I saw this funny video on YouTube last night. I did a search for “retards” and there was this one called “retarded Britney Spears fan.” It was a retard singing one of her songs.
Lawyer #2: Have you seen 2 Girls 1 Cup?
Lawyer #1: I was able to watch about two seconds of it before I had to click it off.
Lawyer #2: Did you see the one called “extreme pain”? I could only watch about five seconds of it. A guy was cutting off his own dick.
Lawyer #1: That's some sick shit. How's your cat?
Lawyer #2: You should see her. She rolls over on her back and my dog licks her between the legs for a long time, then smacks his lips.
Lawyer #1: You should video that and put it on YouTube. Call it “eating pussy.” You'll get a million hits!
–Civil Court, 141 Livingston St., Brooklyn
Overheard by: Big Larry
Guy #1: Yo, did you just check out the vagina on that mannequin?
Guy #2: Yeah, is that weird?
Guy #1: Nah, I did too.
–57th & 5th
Overheard by: alex
Drunk girl with tinsel in her hair: Alright, so why is in my history that it says "thehugestcock.com"?
–Starbucks, Sheridan Square
Drunk guy: The Amazins? Fuck them! The only amazin' thing about them is they never fucking win…
–Downtown 6 Train
Drunk man at 1:30 am: Vagina bar!
–49th St, Astoria
Drunk girlfriend to even drunker boyfriend: Ohmigod! I have to get up in five hours and teach!
–116th St
Chick: … So she had sex with both Rush Limbaugh and Bernie Kerik? Ewww, I wouldn’t want to be her vagina!
–10 E 53rd St
Overheard by: I thought ewww, too
Fat latina: You mean it don’t shake and jump up and down? Girl, what kinda clit do you have?
–Stanton & Clinton
Old guy sweeping sidewalk: You won’t see me begging for no pussy. No way.
–118th & 5th
Overheard by: robin b
Girl in skirt to boy, both standing in the cold: If you could see my undercarriage right now you would see that it’s quivering.
–21st & Broadway
Guy on cell: Yeah, girl. Well, just wait, ’cause I’m gonna terrorize your pussy tonight.
–Flatbush Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Peter Rice
Lesbian: … So I was like, ‘Fine, bitch. You can shove your own fucking fingers up your own fucking cooch. I’m going to put on my clothes and sit in the corner and change my Facebook status…’
–Restroom, Stuyvesant High School
Teen boy: I ate too much pussy. Now I have pussy poisoning.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: sara swank
