Six-year-old boy: Look, Daddy — another Picasso!
Father: No, it isn’t. You know better than that.
–Modern Wing, Metropolitan Museum of Art
Overheard by: Jim W.
Six-year-old boy: Look, Daddy — another Picasso!
Father: No, it isn’t. You know better than that.
–Modern Wing, Metropolitan Museum of Art
Overheard by: Jim W.
10-year-old girl: Mom! My hotdog has chunks of fat in it!
Mom: What are you talking about? There ain’t no fat in a hotdog!
–Avenue of the Americas
Overheard by: clancy
Tourist son: But what do they call Chinese food in China?
Tourist mom, thinking: I don’t know honey, good question.
–36th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Omar
Hipster chick: [Whispering]… Vagina. [Whispering]… Vagina. [Whispering]… Haha, vagina!
Six people collectively: Shut up!
Four-year-old boy: Mom, what’s a vagina?
Mom: It’s a word that only fucking inconsiderate people say around four-year-olds.
Four-year-old: Mom, what’s ‘fucking’?
–A train
Overheard by: Alex Gherardi aka Booger
Black employee: Yo, why you gotta be hatin’ on my family like that?
White kid: Because you’re black.
Black employee: … Your mama’s black!
–Gristedes, 20th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Caroline
Hobo: Why is love so goddamn expensive?
–Outside MoMA
Overheard by: Chris
Drunk ghetto girl screaming into cell: He told me he loved me and this and that… And this and that, dammit! And then his cock was in her, and I was like, ‘Whoa, are you with me or not?!’ So I pulled her weave out and– Hello? Are you still there?
–Bushwick, Brooklyn
Overheard by: I just wanted to sleep
WASP suit: The newspaper made me fall in love with Brad Pitt.
–53rd & Lex
Overheard by: not in love with brad pitt
Little girl: I love you, brain.
–87th & York
Girl on cell: Tell your man to stay out of my business, or I’ll break his jaw. I’ll break his jaw again! I don’t need the love of a man, I’ve got my mother and Jesus to fuckin’ love me. I can meet people — I’ve got MySpace, AOL, IM, and I can chat!
–Subway station, Canal St
Dad: … Should have hit him — you don’t just let someone just step on your hand like that…
Four-year-old: Da-aaad! It was an accident.
–Heckscher Playground
Overheard by: Clarity Burntime
Mother to friend: So, I had a hot flash the other day, and I was like, ‘Oh my god! Am I going through menopause?’ and–
Son: –Mom! What does ‘menopause’ mean? [Mother ignores him.] If you don’t tell me, I’ll yell it in public until you do!
–Starbucks
Eight-year-old delinquent: Yeah, son, I’m gonna get drunk on eggnog!
Six-year-old brother: I’ma drink me two beers!
Mother: Shut up, yous were all tricked! That was apple cider!
–A train
Overheard by: Hungover Intern
Little girl exiting restroom: Mommy! I’m not afraid to have a baby anymore!
Mother: Huh?
Little girl: I just had the biggest poop ever!
–McDonald’s
