Mother: What did you say? He’s a professor of cold-cut studies?
Daughter: No, mom! He’s a professor of Holocaust studies!
–74th & 3rd
Mother: What did you say? He’s a professor of cold-cut studies?
Daughter: No, mom! He’s a professor of Holocaust studies!
–74th & 3rd
Kid: Daddy! Daddy! Can I give you a wedgie?
Father: If you do I won’t feed you for a week
Cashier laughs.
Father: At least he asked this time… Usually he just does it
–Walgreens, Manhattan
Suit: I’m going to have challah bread french toast for dinner tonight. My good-for-nothing wife can’t make me dinner — she’s nine months pregnant. She’s home all day, still in pajamas at 2:30 in the afternoon. Why don’t you try putting on some pants, that will get you motivated.
–uptown 2 train leaving Wall Street
Overheard by: Megan W
Guy #1: I wouldn’t have sex with her. I love my penis too much.
Guy #2: You said that kinda loud.
Guy #1: Don’t worry, there’s no Overheard in New Jersey.
–Port Authority Bus Terminal
Old woman: Where’d you park our car?
Old man: I don’t know. What’s it look like?
–Outside McDonald’s, Fulton St
Jewish girl to black friend: I want a black boyfriend…what if I turned really ghetto? What if I start to wear baby phat? I’ll be like, this is what Kamal likes. Ohmygod, what if he has his own made-up name? I’ll be like, oh Styx just called me.
–98th & Madison
Overheard by: nathalie
Starting today, Overheard in New York will be running regular headline contests. What you do: Click on the link at the top left of the site, read the headless entry, and let your brilliance unfold. What you get: Headline credit when the entry is posted, props from friends and coworkers, and a link to your blog (at our discretion).
Girl #1: So the entire time i’m watching this movie, I’m like, what is the Holy Grail? They never explain what it is. And I’m thinking it’s probably like, some kind of trophy or something…? Like maybe a fashion trophy…? Or something…?
Girl #2: Uh huh.
Girl #1: Yeah but no, it turns it out it actually has to do with like, Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene or something.
Girl #2: So it was like… Jesus’s trophy?
–H&M dressing room, 5th Ave
Punk girl #1: You know what I smell whenever I pass by this store?
Punk girl #2: Heh, what?
Punk girl #1: Anorexia.
–In front of Abercrombie, 5th Ave
Guy setting up stage: Hey did American Idol confirm?
Other guy setting up stage: Yeah, Simon confirmed for 1:30 PM.
Tourist: Oh my God are you serious?!
Other guy: Hey Charlie, you were right, it is fun messing with the tourists!
–Ninth Avenue Street Fair
