Girl #1: Why do they have them?
Girl #2: Because pandas are so Asian!
–1st & 1st
Girl #1: Why do they have them?
Girl #2: Because pandas are so Asian!
–1st & 1st
White woman with white pooch on cell: I fucking hate white people.
–19th & Park
Chick: Yeah, I always wanted to do that play in high school, but then I was like, ‘Oh, yeah, I’m white.’
–13th & 5th
Overheard by: Sarah
Hobo to group of teen hipster girls: Oh my god, you ladies are beautiful! And you’re all white!
–Bleecker St
Black chick: When I was little I thought that white people pooped white.
–35th & 8th
Old black lady to others outside office building being investigated for the smell of gas: … And then I saw all the white people leaving, so I left.
–15th & 8th
Overheard by: Evacuated Employee
Man waiting for The Color Purple: We’re the only white people here.
Fellow whitey: No, there’s a white family in line right there with a guy videotaping.
–Outside CBS store
Guy on cell: I could get better numbers if I beat up an Asian kid!
–42nd & 5th
Overheard by: ericaS
Crazy guy to mailman: Look, maybe you don’t understand what I’m asking. All that I’m saying is that I’ve noticed a lot of mailmen are Asian, and I was wondering if you knew why.
–33rd & 30th, Astoria
Overheard by: Jeffrey
Chick on cell: I found, living in Japan, that it’s very Asian.
–28th & Lex
Overheard by: Cheryl
Teen girl on phone: Yeah, I wouldn’t mind if he said that to an Asian… but only an Asian!
–86th St
Overheard by: Lotte
Japanese boy to Korean girl: Koreans generalize a lot.
–Broadway, near NYU
Overheard by: Daniel
Korean-American: In Korea, Koreans run everything. There, Jews are just nice people.
–Dean & DeLuca, University Place
Guy: This is like waiting in a breadline in Russia.
–Long line to get into Magnolia Bakery
Overheard by: Amy
Guy on cell: I got sexually molested by a teenager in Turkey!
–11th St & 2nd Ave
Chick: Huh. Lot of Egypt.
–Egyptian art wing, the Met
Overheard by: Rhian
Girl having to throw away beer: That’s so sad — think of all the sober children in Ethiopia.
–Brooklyn Brewery
Overheard by: Eelco
Girl to boyfriend: What did you do today? Oprah probably fed a small country.
–13th St & 2nd Ave
Lady giving friend reindeer hat: Isn’t it great? I’m sure some Pakistani kid went blind making it, but y’know…
–Fancy restaurant, West Village
Overheard by: lbw
Black kid pointing at shirt: This shit is gangsta! It’s from Japan!
–The Gap, Times Square
Dad: … And how do you know when we’re in the Village, sweetie?
Tween girl: Hipsters?
Dad: Uh, no, I was talking about that sign [points to ‘Welcome to Greenwich’ sign].
Tween girl: Oh.
–Bleecker & MacDougal
Guy #1: I try to stay away from Italian women.
Guy #2: Why?
Guy #1: Because they are hairy.
–Broadway & 50th
Overheard by: Keithrez
Jersey lady pointing at a French bulldog: Look at this face! He’s adorable! He looks Italian!
–26th & 7th
Overheard by: sara n.
College chick: You were born in Italy? That’s awesome… Speak some Italy for me. Wait, that’s what you speak, right?
–Classroom
Drunk yelling at a pizza shop: Who the fuck are you? You’re fucking Mexican! You’re not Italian! I’m Italian!! I make the fucking pizzas in this town!
–Bedford and N 7th St
Overheard by: Actually I’m from Equador
Guy: I feel like I’m at a dry-cleaning convention that is being shaken down by the mob.
–Korean-Italian wedding
Overheard by: Retarded Quarterback
Old lady with a cane: My father is Jewish and my mother is Italian, and I am in therapy.
–Lower Manhattan
Drunk girl #1: I wish Colette* would speak French to us.
Drunk girl #2: That would be, like, so awesome!
Drunk girl #3: Colette doesn’t speak French! Doesn’t she speak, like, Puerto Rican?
–Fordham University Ram Van
Overheard by: Ali McE
Man in Who shirt: Whoa! I didn’t see that shirt! That’s a cool one!
Man with French accent: Oh, yeah, I got this one at the show in France.
Man in Who shirt: Were they screaming as loud as we were tonight?
Man with French accent: No, we put our hands over our heads and snap our fingers and say ‘Ooh-la-la.’
His wife: What’d you have to do that for? You don’t have to fuck around with everyone on the street!
Man with French accent, now speaking in Brooklyn accent: What’s the fun of wearing a fake, five-dollar Chinatown Who shirt if I’m not gonna make fun of those assholes in the process?
–Pizza shop outside MSG after the Who show
