On the Subway

Young teen boy: She obviously must wear push-up bras, cause sometimes it's big and sometimes it's smaller!
Young teen girl: I wore push-up bras in like, 5th grade. But once you start wearing them you can't stop, cause then everyone will know! But I don't need them anymore, I caught up.

–F Train

Overheard by: TheKatiedidntwearpushupsin5thgrade…

Headline by: Fresca

Runners-Up:
· “But I’m Still Wearing Pull-Ups Panties” – JohnnyB
· “No Boobies Left Behind Is Working Splendidly for American Youth” – rachel
· “Overheard at Dolly Parton Junior High School” – Vasyl
· “Somewhere There’s a Salvation Army Stocked with Wonderbras…” – RaRa
· “What You Call “Catching Up” Everyone Else Calls “Augmentation Surgery”” – If I can touch em.

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Chick #1: You know why guys don’t like mushrooms?
Chick #2: Who said guys don’t like mushrooms?
Chick #1: Because they taste like cum!

–N train

Little boy: My favorite part of the game is when I get to kill, but you only get to kill other people in the wilderness.

–1 train

Overheard by: STD

Little girl: Don’t pull my hair!
Mom: I wasn’t! I was just holding on.
Little girl: To my hair?

–D train

Guy#1: “Roosevelt Island”. Is this the same as Roosevelt Avenue?
Girl: I don’t know. Maybe.
Guy #1: Let’s try it.
Guy #2: You don’t want to get off here. Roosevelt Avenue is later.
Guy #1: Thanks. You know, I hear New Yorkers are mean but so far I’ve only met nice ones.

–F train

White girl: Since I quit, I have been blowing out the biggest boogers in the mornings.
Black guy: Boogers? I been blowin’ moons. Like the moons of Jupiter.

–1 Train

Woman: It’s about an old depressed cat and her friends put her in a tire and shoot her to heaven.

–R train

Overheard by: Misha Lonergan

Woman: Once in a store, a guy left his bag on the floor and I snatched his wallet right out of it.
Man: Boy, you sure are lucky.
Woman: I know, I took the money and bought me a TV.

–A train

Girl #1: I’ve been eating really good foods.
Girl #2: What about all of that yogurt in your fridge? You have like six containers of it.
Girl #1: It’s okay, they don’t expire until January of ’07.
Girl #2: That means January 7th, dumbass.

–L train

Overheard by: Glynnis O

Guy: Stop being such a Debbie Downer.
Girl: Stop watching such shitty tv shows.

–Q train