Guy #1: Yo man, he ain’t got no job and he don’t take care of his kids.
Guy #2: I know, but he’ll learn the hard way; we did.
Guy #1: He been to prison twice already; what else he got to learn?
–Penn Station
Guy #1: Yo man, he ain’t got no job and he don’t take care of his kids.
Guy #2: I know, but he’ll learn the hard way; we did.
Guy #1: He been to prison twice already; what else he got to learn?
–Penn Station
Teen boy: You’re just a little nigger.
Teen girl: Quit playin’.
Teen boy: I will break your fucking fingers, you little nigger.
Teen girl: But–
Teen boy: Shut the fuck up! I’ll fucking kill you. I’ll punch you right in the mouth in front of all these gay fucking white people. What do you have to say?
Teen girl: I–
Teen boy: Shut the fuck up! You think I won’t? You don’t think I’m man enough, do you? I’ll hurt you so bad. I’ll fuck you up. You think I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: That’s right. All you wanna do is sleep all day. You wanna go to bed right now and sleep for four days, 24/7. Fucking worthless. You should fucking die for that.
–Q train
Overheard by: Carrie
Dude: Shit man, slow down. Slow down. Whatcha runnin’ to?Yoga? Nigga’s runnin’ to yoga. White man runnin’ to yoga. Thought yoga was supposed to cure that shit.
–Union Square
Hipster guy: That’s a cool coat, it’s pimp.
Ghetto guy: Thanks…Did you say “pimp”? I’m not a pimp.
Hipster guy: No, I meant pimp like cool.
Ghetto guy: Oh, okay…It’s not real. I’m a vegan.
–A train
Overheard by: M.E. Patton
Guy #1: You know what we need? A nice breeze.
Guy #2: What the fuck are you talking about? It’s cold as balls.
Guy #1: I was being ironic.
Guy #2: That’s not ironic. Ironic is like…shit, I don’t know. Like that song.
Guy #1: Naw, man. That’s what people think, but ironic is when you say some shit but you mean some other shit.
Guy #2: Motherfucker, that’s facetious.
Guy #1: Yeah…Then what’s ironic?
Guy #2: How the fuck should I know? You the nigga with the GED.
–49th & 7th
Guy #1: Nigga, where you goin’?
Guy #2: To the middle of the train. I wanna be in the middle.
Guy #1: But we’re standing in the middle motherfucka.
Guy #2: No, the middle is at the end.
–23rd Street F/V station
Overheard by: Halli Civelek
Vendor guy: I got so much dirt under my nails, you’d think I was a crackhead.
–Fulton Mall
Overheard by: Black Girl Superstar
Store girl: Here’s your receipt and have a happy holiday!
Store guy: The holidays are over.
Store girl: Valentine’s Day is coming up.
–Mazzone True Value Hardware, Carroll Gardens
Overheard by: Rob
Thug guy: Yo, happy New Year’s, man.
Janitor guy: New Year’s is over, yo.
Thug guy: Happy Mother’s Day!
–Port Authority
Old guy: Shit, I ain’t goin’ ice skating, I ain’t no motherfuckin’ ice skater. I’m a thug, I’m a motherfuckin’ thug nigga. Fuckin’ ice skater…L’il girl, you going ice skating?
–The Pond, Bryant Park
Overheard by: C.G.
Ghetto guy: Everyone on this train need to smile!
–L train
Overheard by: Lily
