Guy: …And she had the nerve; she didn’t even ask me to be her friend. She just sent me her profile!
Chick: Omigod, you should so send her a frowny.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: djlindee
Lady lawyer: Hey, what animal year are you?
Boy attorney #1: The monkey, I think.
Boy attorney #2: Dude, chimpanzees freak me out after seeing Outbreak.
Boy attorney #1: That was a monkey, not a chimpanzee.
Lady lawyer: The thing I don’t like about monkeys is their butts.
–Office, East 45th Street
Girl: When you were talking about Saddam Hussein, it reminded me of Osama bin Laden. Wasn’t he born here or something?
Professor lady: No…
Girl: Then he grew up here?
Professor: No…
College girl: Oh, right! He came here to go to an Ivy League, didn’t he?
–Tisch Hall, West 4th Street
Woman: Do your gay thing and get us up ahead of this line full of teenage girls!
Queer: All right! “Girl…I need to get me a t-shirt! Move this Long Island trash outta my way!”
Teen girl: Please! Whateva Jersey!
Woman: Oh my god! She knew you were from Jersey!
–Madison Square Garden
Overheard by: J.Mo
Old lady: I’m telling you: she’s allergic to snow!
–28th & Park
Overheard by: Eliot Glazer
Girl: I don’t know if he’s straight or gay, I can’t tell.
Guy: You know that saying “innocent until proven guilty”? Well, everyone at Pratt is gay until proven straight.
–Hoyt-Schermerhorn station
Overheard by: Peter F.
