Bimbettes

Do Those One-Liners Go All the Way Up to Your Wednesday?

Lady to another: I'm waxing my crotch whether he likes it or not!

–52nd & Madison

Overheard by: someguyslikethejungle

Preteen: Yo, she bit Mark's crotch!

–66th & Broadway

Overheard by: dan

Girl to another: I don't think he'd like your stiletto heel in his actual crotch. Oh, now your twat is all over the place.

–Olivebridge

Man on cell, noticing, "The Big Penis Book": Hey, I'm at this bookstore and they have this big book of penises… Oh, you have it already? The big book, with the pink cover and crotch on the front? Oh, okay, cool.

–Bookstore, Brookyln

Bimbo: Crotches are always wrong!

–American Apparel Store

Wow, That’s So Vapid!

Bimbo: I’d put on a sweater and baggy pants, and everyone would be like, “Wow, that’s so Margello!”

–Ave A & 3rd St.

To Be Fair, There’s a Thin Line between a Yarmulke and a Beret

Girl #1: Oy vey.
Girl #2: What’s an ‘oy vey’?
Girl #1: It’s something French people say when they’re stressed out.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: bhahah

What's “Shit,” Again?

Bimbo #1: Oh my god, like I could totally pickpocket you right now.
Bimbo #2: No you couldn't, I could like totally feel you!
Bimbo #1: Like I totally want to learn how to pickpocket.
Bimbo #2: I like want be a professional pickpocket.
Bimbo #1: Yeah, but you have to be all stealthy and shit.
Bimbo #2: There you go using big words again!

–Fordham University, Lincoln Center

Overheard by: Kate Melvin

I Told Her I’d Text Her in the Morning… And She Believed Me

Chick #1: My mom just sent me a text message.
Chick #2: What’d she say?
Chick #1: "I love you." And I said, "Is this your first text message?" instead of saying "I love you" back. She said it was her first time! So I told her, "You’re no longer a virgin." My mom lost her text-message virginity to me!

–Bryant Park

Overheard by: tanechka

A Downtown Scene

Woman #1: I think we should beat him up.
Woman #2: I’m a Muslim Buddhist Jew. I don’t wanna listen to his Christian rock!
Woman #3: Hee hee…yeah!

–Financial District

They Can’t All Belong to Narcissistic Assholes

Girl #1: He was a narcissistic asshole, and I’m glad to be rid of him, but god I’ll miss that big dick.
Girl #2: There’s better dick in the sea, and I’m sure you’ll come upon some.

–Union Square

Overheard by: I feel you girl

Hell Is This Other Person

Blonde: I hate waiting for people! It’s so boring!
Brunette: Well, what do you think I was doing for the past 40 minutes?
Blonde: Oh, wow! Sitting outside?!

–Outside I.S. 34, Staten Island

Not Everything, Mr. Foer. Not Everything.

Girl: I’m looking for a name of book that has the word “eliminate” in it.
Store guy: Okay. Let me see. Hmm…It doesn’t look like anything came up in the search.
Girl: I know that’s the word! I know it is. I really need this book!
Store guy: Okay. I’ll try and search again.
Girl: It’s “eliminate” with an I, not an E.
Store guy: Oh, you mean illuminate?

–Barnes & Noble, 82nd & Broadway

Overheard by: christina rusnak

Okay, Like Some Horrible Hybrid

Chick #1: Jessica, I’m not kidding, he looked like a beaver!
Chick #2: Christine, that’s vulgar!
Chick #1: No, but seriously — like a chipmunk!
Chick #2: But why wouldn’t you say ‘chipmunk’ instead?
Chick #1: Because he seriously looked like a real beaver!

–77th & Madison

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