Hipster: Why you wearin’ such a big hat?
Junkie wearing top hat: It’s not just a hat — it’s a port-a-potty.
–E Houston near Broadway
Overheard by: Big Larry
Hipster: Why you wearin’ such a big hat?
Junkie wearing top hat: It’s not just a hat — it’s a port-a-potty.
–E Houston near Broadway
Overheard by: Big Larry
Teen: There’s a world war in my pants, and everyone’s invited!
–Ft. Greene Pl
Overheard by: Liz
Mini thug to girls: Damn, bitches, slow down! You know a nigga can’t walk in these pants.
–Queens
Hot chick: I’m just so sick of putting on pants.
–E train, WTC
Overheard by: inothernews
Cougar: She pulled down his pants and there it was, like a machine gun! Just hangin’ there. Rat-a-tat-tat. It was that big.
–Blue & Gold, East Village
Overheard by: Evan
Man with hands down pants: I’m sorry… My penis is too long for these pants.
–62nd & Columbus
Overheard by: Caissie
Preppy girl #1: Are these boyfriend panties, or are these cheating-on-your-boyfriend panties?
Preppy girl #2: I think they’re a little slutty.
Preppy girl #1: So, for cheating?
Preppy girl #2: Yeah.
Preppy girl #1: Do you think this is all they have, or is there another drawer?
–Victoria’s Secret
Little girl: Guess what I’m wearing?
Mom’s friend: What?
Little girl: Underwear!
–Bagel Boys
Skinny chick: Was there scaffolding on his building?
Fat chick: Yeah, don’t you remember? I climbed it in my Catwoman costume on Halloween.
–Greenwich & 6th
Overheard by: tj
Black girl #1: … And you know white girls don’t wear no panties!
Black girl #2: I don’t wear panties either… I mean, I do when I go out, but when I’m at home my labias be swingin’.
–TGIFridays, 34th St
Overheard by: sad to say i was sitting near them
Girl wearing cargo capris: Do I look like a lesbian in these pants?
Stranger girl: Yeah, why?
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: Hal
Bimbette #1: Oh my god, this is a shirt? I thought it was a dress!
Bimbette #2: And that’s because you’re a slut.
Bimbette #1: No, seriously, I could rock this as a dress.
Bimbette #2: Here we go again.
–42nd & Lex
Overheard by:
50-ish woman: … And the chaps covered his front, but his whole backside was out for the world to see.
20-ish woman: Oooh!
50-ish woman: No, honey. There was no ‘Oooh’ about it.
–116th & Broadway
Overheard by: AdHoculi
