20-ish guy: Can I please put my balls in your hair?!
Girlfriend: No! Knock it off!
–Staten Island Ferry
20-ish guy: Can I please put my balls in your hair?!
Girlfriend: No! Knock it off!
–Staten Island Ferry
Distraught girl: Is there an ‘I’ in ‘relationship’?
Guy: [Silence.]Distraught girl: Well, is there?!
Guy: Um… There’s two, actually…
Distraught girl: God… You’re so selfish! You just don’t understand me.!
–Brother Jimmy’s, 92nd & 3rd
Overheard by: issheaskinghimthis?
Girl: Get the fuck outta here! I’ll fucking kill you!
Guy: So, I was thinking about…
Girl: I just threatened your life and you have nothing to say?!
Guy, shrugging: I love you.
–Park Ave
Overheard by: LiveNY
Girlfriend: My shoes are killing me.
Boyfriend: If you don't stop I'll have to punch you in the cunt.
Girlfriend: Would you even know where to find it?
–East Village
Overheard by: C
Thug: So, if I’m half black and half American Indian, that makes me Puerto Rico.
Thugette: I told you that you was Puerto Rican.
–149th & 3rd, Bronx
Headline by: Mariya
Runners-Up:
· “Actually, it makes you unemployed” – Mr. Bone
· “Bitch, don’t be callin’ me no adjectival form!” – was “rico”/”rican” the first thing you noticed too?
· “Dora the Explorer: South Bronx Edition” – Scott
· “Runs With Hookers didn’t excel in Ethnic Studies” – bri b
· “The new theory of relativity” – sara swank
Old Park Ave husband: Now this is what the weather is supposed to be.
Old Park Ave wife: Yes. Not too hot, not below zero.
Old Park Ave husband: One of many reasons why Florida is a shit show.
–Park Ave & 61st St
Overheard by: JayHammy
Dude with insane tattoos and piercings: I hope there’s someone sitting in my seat.
Girlfriend with insane tattoos and piercings: Why?
Dude with insane tattoos and piercings: So I can crush his larynx!
–JFK
Overheard by: wrong row, wrong time
Sailor: It was your idea.
Lady friend: You think I should dress like a man?
–Little Italy
Middle aged woman, loudly: Spring is in the air, and I'm feeling sprung!
Middle aged husband: Babe, what the hell ya doin?
–Starbucks, Queens
Girl: This popcorn is soft. I hate soft popcorn.
Guy: I know, I hate soft-core, too. It’s such a tease.
Girl: No, no. I was talking about the popcorn — it’s soft. But I agree: if there is no penetration, it’s not worth my time.
–Ziegfeld Theater
