…So I'll Steal Your Wallet Respectfully.

Hobo: Can I ask for a favor?
Man: Not today, mate (walks away)
Hobo, muttering: Well, at least you're honest.

Outside Mall
West Australia

Posted on July 14, 2010
Australia, Comebacks, Guys, Hobos, Malls, Offers and requests

Mrs. Clinton's a Superb Secretary Of State

Hobo in track suit, shouting into cell: Why? Because she has no goddamn boundaries!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on July 6, 2010
Hobos, Insults, Massachusetts, On the phone, Questions

Don't Flirt With the Homeless, Dude

Gay guy to hobo: Good morning. Did you get a hair cut?
Hobo: (mutters about spare change)
Gay guy: I know you got a hair cut! See, if you would have said hi to me, maybe I would have given you a dollar or something! (starts walking down street) Why do people have to be so ignorant on such a sunny day?

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Meater Maid

Posted on May 1, 2010
Assholes, Bragging, Hobos, Money, Panhandling, Pennsylvania, Queers

You're Gonna Love Detroit, Sir

Social worker talking to hobo: What can I get for you, sir?
Hobo: How about a 9 mm semi-automatic gun?
Social worker: Well, I can't do that, but do you need bus tickets? Where are you going?
Hobo: Hell.
Social worker: Okay, I'll get those bus tickets then.
Hobo: Your hair's much nicer than mine.

Hospital
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: yooo

Posted on November 18, 2009
Canadia, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Employees, Evil, Hair, Hobos, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Violence, Weirdness

David Byrne, Is That You?

Disgruntled hobo outside dollar store: All anyone ever thinks about is “Do I still love him?” and “What happened to your teeth?” That don't make no sense!

Los Angeles, California

Posted on October 26, 2009
Body parts, California, Feelings, Hobos

You've Got Game If You Can Pick Up Girls at the Reading Room

Bearded old hobo: Heyyy, Cinderella.
Teenage girl: Um… hi!
Bearded old hobo: Want me to read the bible to ya?
Teenage girl: No thanks, I'm good.
Bearded old hobo: I know you are. (winks)

Outside Christian Science Reading Room
Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on September 7, 2009
Christianity, Hobos, Names, Offers and requests, Old folks, Teens, Weirdness, Wishes

And I Love Your Ass

Hobo to another: Guys like us were never taught the value of words. And that's why I always come out on top. Because I understand the meaning of the word “itinerant.” And you, sir, are an itinerant and a philanderer!

New York City, New York

Posted on August 19, 2009
Hobos, New York, Weirdness, Words

Alice Had Yet to Learn to Scream “Back the Fuck Off Me!”

Terrifyingly cheerful woman, handing out christian pamphlets at bus stop: Hello! Would you like something to read on the bus?
Girl, already reading large book: I'm, uh…I'm already…
Crazy looking hobo, scoffing and muttering to girl: People can be insane.

Los Angeles, California

Posted on May 24, 2009
Books, California, Crazies, Default, Girls, Hobos, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Questions, Weirdness, Women

It Defines Me.

Hobo to hipster: Is a BlackBerry a cell phone?
Hipster: Yeah, but I don't have one.
Hobo: I like blackberry pie!

Los Angeles, California

Posted on May 12, 2009
California, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Fruit, Hipsters, Hobos, Questions

I Gotta Get Home for Shabbas

Hobo, picking through recycling for cans and bottles: Thank god it's Friday!

Central Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Posted on March 28, 2009
Compare and contrast, Default, God, Happiness, Hobos, Massachusetts

Hobos