Ghetto girl #1, as lady tourist outside knocks on door: Why that woman knockin’ on the door?
Ghetto girl #2: ‘Cause she white.
–D train
Ghetto girl #1, as lady tourist outside knocks on door: Why that woman knockin’ on the door?
Ghetto girl #2: ‘Cause she white.
–D train
Black woman to tanning salon flyer guy soliciting her: Nigga, you be blind!
–W 4th St & 6th Ave
White woman on cell: I cannot meet you there — that’s a black neighborhood. [Looks around. to find that everyone else in line is black, and pharmacist is black.] Oops.
–Duane Reade
Little girl pointing at black receptionist: Pocahontas!
–Dermatologist, UES
Overheard by: Kate
Black suit: Oh, I’m the only black man in America who watches Felicity?!
–Washington Square Park
Black queer on cell: I believe she set black people back 20 years by rhyming ‘Lexington’ with ‘Nextel.’
–Fort Tryon Park
Overheard by: Pies
Sports editor: We need more magical black men.
–Columbia Spectator office
Overheard by: Kavitha
Black guy: White guys look at women more holistically.
–Q station, Cortelyou Rd
Overheard by: LC
Little boy: Why do white people say, ‘Like, like, like, like, like’? Is that the only word in their vocabulary?
–14th & Broadway
18-year-old thug, as doors open: Bye, all you white folk! Buh-bye!
–A train, Howard Beach/JFK stop
Overheard by: Thompson
Thug: Yo, I just watched a white kid get tasered on the news last night, and I was like, ‘Yeah, yeah, get him!’
–181st & St. Nicholas
Overheard by: I knew that kid
Three-year-old girl to no one in particular: The white man is everywhere. [Mother looks at her, puzzled. Girl gazes up at crosswalk sign] The white man tells us when to go.
–86th & 2nd
Overheard by: Damn the man!
White boy: I’d never be intimidated by the black people in Connecticut after spending a few days here.
White girl: You think the black people here are intimidating?
White boy: Like, I’d walk up to a couple black guys at home after being here and just be like, ‘Excuse me,’ if they were standing in my way.
–Lafayette & Claussen
Black guy #1: Yes, well, we look alike because we’re fraternal twins.
Black guy #2: Yeah, you didn’t know we were brothers?
White guy: Everyone said you guys were brothers, but I figured they meant ‘brothas’ and not actual brothers.
Black guy #1: Oh… Okay. Hey, look, we’re at Shea.
–LIRR, Shea Stadium
Black girl: Hey, mister, can we pet your dog?
Tough guy with groomed white poodle on leash: Sure.
Black girl to friend: See, that’s what a poodle looks like when a white man owns it.
–10th & Christopher
Black teen #1, after horror movie preview: Oh, snap, yo!
Black teen #2: Stop being black at the movies!
Black teen #1, in a high voice: Oh, that was totally cool!
–Regal Theater, 42nd St
Overheard by: Rachel
Test-taker #1: You know how good a test location is by the ratio of people to Asians.
Test-taker #2: Huh?
Test-taker #1: That’s how it’s done.
–Line for SATs, Martin Luther King High
Black actress onstage: If anymore white people walk in here, we’re gonna become a suburb!
Suburban white girl in audience: I don’t get it.
–Showing of Hairspray
Puerto Rican woman: So, if you hadn’t been born boricua, what nationality would you want to be?
Puerto Rican man: Black.
Puerto Rican woman: Awww, it’s not that small, mi amor.
–B train, 50th St
Overheard by: Hablo Español!
