Retail Therapy

Salesman#1: How do you pronounce this guy’s name?
Salesman#2: I’m afraid to try; I might chip a friggin’ tooth.

–Jacob Javits Center

Overheard by: willy k

Little boy: What’s the “n word,” Dad?
Dad: I’m not gonna tell you.
Little boy: Why?
Mom: It’s worse than all the other words because it makes specific people feel bad.
Dad: You don’t need to know it. It’s one of those things you’ll learn when you get older. You’ll learn a lot of bad things when you get older.

–Barnes and Noble, Astor Place

Overheard by: Ben

You’ll learn all this and more, at 7PM on Wednesday night at the store above. Please come join us as we discuss and sign our new book.

Old woman: You still don’t have any Halloween candy, huh?
Old man: Valentine’s Day. It’s Valentine’s Day candy! Why do you keep calling it Halloween?

–Duane Reade, 62nd & Broadway

Overheard by: Charlie Davidson

Girl: It’s not that it’s small, it’s just…not that big.
Guy: I wish we could stop talking about this now.
Girl: …Maybe you could just stop shaving.

–CompUSA, 57th & Broadway

Overheard by: Leonor M.