Girl: Hi, I’d like a medium iced coffee with lots of ice, skim milk and Equal, please.
Cashier chick: What kind of ice?
–Dunkin’ Donuts, Penn Station
Overheard by: devila
Girl: Hi, I’d like a medium iced coffee with lots of ice, skim milk and Equal, please.
Cashier chick: What kind of ice?
–Dunkin’ Donuts, Penn Station
Overheard by: devila
Drunk guy: We should go to the OTB and bet on some horses.
Drunk girl: Why would you bet on prostitutes?
Drunk guy: I don’t think you heard me correctly.
–14th & 2nd
Overheard by: Bryant
Rich girl #1: So she got into a fight with her step mother last night.
Rich girl #2: But she can’t have a stepmother; her real mother isn’t dead yet!
–6 train
Overheard by: Adam
Chick #1: I want chocolate, but no nuts. What kind of candy bar doesn’t have nuts?
Chick #2: Um…Almond Joy?
–Bodega, 44th & 9th
Overheard by: Peter Shankman
Woman with baby: So I’ve been takin’ these classes, and like they teach you how to draw blood from people and shit, but they have all these funny names for things. Like your skull, they call it the…um…
Woman without baby: Cranium?
Woman with baby: Yeah, the cranium. And they don’t call it “blood”, they call it…cells.
–F train
Overheard by: Miss N.
Suit on cell: Hey, guess where I am?…Guess…I’m in Glasgow!
–Carmine & Bleecker
Overheard by: Chris Cotterman
Preppy guy: How am I racist? I’m Irish! I can’t be racist!
–9th Street & 3rd Avenue
Overheard by: Miss Hipstah
Woman on cell: My daughter went to Montreal. I was like, “Why do you have to go where the French go? Why couldn’t you just go to Ontario?”
–55th & 3rd
Bag lady: Can I have a quarter? The Irish have taken over the YMCA.
–22nd & 5th
Overheard by: smanikas
Thug: Paisano?…It’s like “my nigga” but in Italian.
–Times Square
Overheard by: KRUD
Guy #1: Yeah, my mom said this church would help us find God or
something…
Guy #2: How are you supposed to find God?
Guy #1: Hell, I dunno, she said something about a treasure hunt…
–23rd & 10th
Overheard by: Karina
Chick: Hey, did the space shuttle land yet?
Man: No, it’s still circling in space endlessly.
Chick: Really, so are they stuck up there?
Man: I’m kidding. It landed last week.
Chick: So did it land in California or at JFK?
Man: JFK? What the hell are you talking about? You mean the Kennedy Space Center, not JFK! I can’t believe you’re going to be a doctor.
–George Washington Bridge Bus Station
Fat guy #1: So I go in and he’s like, “This definitely isn’t a fun job or anything. It’s not an exciting job. This isn’t one of those jobs where you going to be happy about coming into the office in the morning. This job isn’t, you know, you’re not going to learn anything at this job. But you’ll make a lot of money.”
Fat guy #2: Cool.
Fat guy #1: Yeah, so I can sell my soul, y’know? I’m like, “I’ll sell crack to kids if I could make a lot of money.”
–E train
Bicycle girl: It smells like it’s about to rain.
Bicycle guy: That’s because it is raining.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Captain Obvious
