Preteen boy #1, looking at tiny Yorkie: Wow, that is the smallest thing I've ever seen.
Preteen boy #2: That's what she said.
Preteen boy #1: Yeah, that's what she didn't say about you! I mean, that's what she didn't say to me! That's what she said about you!
–30th Ave, Astoria
Overheard by: real smooth.
Teenage girl #1, looking at kid in cute Star Wars costume: Oooh, look at that kid!
Teenage girl #2: Oh, so you're a pedophile too?!
Teenage girl #1: No… I don't have to touch them.
–NYC Comic Con
Young chick #1: They got married really young.
Young chick #2: And he never matured?
Young chick #1: No, and she just got tired of waiting for him to grow up, so they got divorced when she was like 21.
–73rd & Broadway
Teenage boy #1: Yeah, he's gay.
Teenage boy #2: I don't know, he's always hanging out with girls.
Teenage boy #3: Gay guys always hang out with girls! I don't get it! What's in it for them?
–Q Train
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Teen #1: I was just talking to a girl in the bathroom… She was wearing a horrible shirt.
Teen #2: What did you say to her?
Teen #1: I said her shirt was nice.
–W 32nd St
Overheard by: NG
Teenage boy: So I went to a Cher concert…
Teenage girl: What?
Teenage boy: Cher.
Teenage girl: Cher?
Teenage boy: Cher. The singer.
Teenage girl: Who?
Teenage boy: You don't know Cher? Damn, girl, you have no history. You have no childhood. (pause) So I went to a Cher concert. And she came out and looked all hot. “How many of you ladies have been hurt by a man?” (imitates the roar of the crowd) “Aaaaaaahhhh!” She cock-blocked the whole place.
–6 Train
Annoying teenage girl: Hop off my dick, hop off my dick!
Teenage boy: You don't have a dick.
Annoying teenage girl: You don't need a dick to say you have one.
–4 Train
Overheard by: Emm
Man eating ice cream while trying to walk: Beanobeanobeanobeanobeanobeanobeanobeano.
–49th St and 7th Ave Station
Man dressed in green unitard, running in circles: Augghhhhhhhhhh!!! Aughhhhhhhhhh!! Aughhhhhhh!!!!
–Union Square
Moviegoer, after preview for The Blind Side: Blerrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh! (vomiting noises, then audience erupts in laughter)
–Regal Battery Park Stadium Movie Theater
Teenage boy, taking gum out of his pocket and looking at it: Scrotum! (puts gum back in pocket and walks away)
–95th St & Madison
Overheard by: Confused
Man to woman on lunch date: Pussy makes the world go round. When you're 85, dyin', you don't want to regret it if you never got to stick your head up there, or whatever. You wanna die sated.
–Madison Square Park
Overheard by: Christine
Man, as two women approach: Vagiiiiiina, vagiiiiiiiiiiiina, vagiiiiiiiiiiiiiinaaaaaaa!
–Washington Square
Overheard by: Joe
Hipster on cell: I don't even know you! I do not want to see your vagina.
–Park Ave & 22nd St
Overheard by: Sophia
Suit on cell: I'm gonna cut off her cunt and make her wear it as a hat!
–Times Square
Teenager to friend: That girl has a Stargate vagina. You put it in and, bam, a kid pops out!
–Catherine St & Madison St
Girl at speed dating event: …like my vagina!
–Watering Hole, E 19th St
Teen girl on cell: Are you kidding, mom? Google shapes everyone's lives, whether they like it or not. You google everything.
–W 28th St
20-something-girl: He has liked every status I put up since Wednesday. I haven't spoken to him in ages. I was like, "stop peeing all over my Facebook page!"
–42St & 2nd Ave
NYU student on cell: Honestly, that blog was the most profound thing I've ever written.
–Mercer & W 4th
Overheard by: Bloggers have depth too
40-year-old woman dressed as 16-year-old, on cell: Samantha, just go on Facebook and text him already. (pause) Of course you can do that, everyone does it.
–Outside Five Guys Burgers
