Drunk hobo: You are so fucking beautiful. I am in love with you. Please let me give you a hug.
Girl #1: Please, no.
Drunk hobo: Why all you white girls hate on black people? We not all that bad.
Girl #2: It’s not because you’re black. It’s because you’re covered with open sores and blisters.
–Manhattan bound L train
Overheard by: Far
Black chick #1: C’mon.
Black chick #2: Alright, alright, what’s the rush?
Black chick #1: C’mon, I wanna see some white boys dancing.
–Outside Gazebo nightclub, 93rd St & 4th Ave, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: Capn MidNite
Black woman: You know that girl you bumped into? She was handicapped. And you didn’t say, “Excuse me.”
White boy: Um, she bumped into me.
Black woman: So, she’s handicapped. Is it her fault?
White boy: Shut the fuck up and go pick up your welfare check, you entitlement-addicted bitch.
–53rd & 5th
Guy #1 (wearing do-rag): You know why I wear this shit, man?
Guy #2: Nah, man, why?
Guy #1: Because I love the stare. I love it when some dumb white guy stares at me and asks why I wear this so I can curse the shit out of that mothafucka!
–14th & 1st
Black lady with five kids: You can’t get anything here. We gots to get to Old Navy to buy us all our Fourth of July t-shirts so we match at the picnic.
Black guy: They have the best deal. Shirts are five dollars each, that’s like [counts kids, self, and wife] less than twenty bucks for all of us, and even the baby shit has a flag on it.
–Target, Atlantic Terminal, Brooklyn
Overheard by: lora
Asian guy: Yo, nigger.
Black guy: Fuck you. You ain’t my nigger.
–90th St, Elmhurst
Black man: It’s hotter than Hades out there!
Black woman: Don’t insult my country.
–63rd & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Ash
Guy #1: Naw, naw, naw, naw, naw!
Guy #2: Dis game aint no thang. Think about it man. How many brothers you see out here?
Guy #1: How about the cuz sittin’ at first base?
Guy #2: Yo, he Spanish.
–Shea Stadium
Overheard by: Terrence Reasons
Girl #1: But, like, why do all the gay guys have to be so hot?
Girl #2: I know. At least all the lesbians are ugly!
–Times Square
Black guy #1: I’ve been banging her for four weeks now.
Black guy #2: Word!
Black guy #1: Yo, I just found out Ty was banging her, too.
Black guy #2: Man! You can take the ho out of the Bronx but you can’t take Bronx out of the ho.
–F train platform, Bryant Park station
Overheard by: Sal S.
