Guy #1: Man, there are so many hipsters around. I hate hipsters!
Guy #2: You’re at the wrong place. That’s like going to Vegas only to say “I hate titties!”
–The Warsaw, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Thiess
Guy #1: Man, there are so many hipsters around. I hate hipsters!
Guy #2: You’re at the wrong place. That’s like going to Vegas only to say “I hate titties!”
–The Warsaw, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Thiess
Girl: I’m looking for a play for school.
Bookseller: What’s the name?
Girl: Antigen.
Bookseller: You mean Antigone?
Girl: What’s the difference?
Bookseller: One’s a play about a girl and her dead brother, and the other is a play that hasn’t been written yet about carbohydrates and proteins.
Girl: Oh. The dead one, then.
–Barnes & Noble, Court St.
Chick: Why you looking at her? Who is she?
Guy: I don’t know, but she’s sexy as hell.
Chick: Nigga please. She ain’t all that. What she got that I don’t got?
Guy: A pretty face, a nice ass, big tits, a banging body…Need I say more?
–Downtown Brooklyn
Overheard by: The girl they were talking about
Guy: There’s a very large building missing from my neighborhood.
Girl: A building missing, eh? Have you been smoking the dope?
Guy: Yes.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: djlindee
Guy: Yeah, it’s like all three of our neurons are coming together right now.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Phe
Man: What’s the name of that wine? Lan?
Bartender guy: Yep, Lan.
Man: That doesn’t stand for Large Area Network, does it?
Bartender guy: Er, no.
Man: Good.
–Bar Minnow, Park Slope
Overheard by: Armchair Athlete
Teacher guy: You guys know that clock in Union Square that goes
backwards, right?
Teen girl: But why does it change?
–Midwood High School
Girl: Hey, you know I heard this guy did drugs one time, and he had some kind of permanent reaction, and now he thinks he’s a glass of orange juice!
Guy: Oh yeah, I heard about that. He goes around telling people not to tip him!
Girl: Yeah, yeah. Hey, imagine if he saw someone drinking orange juice.
Guy: Now that would be funny.
–Fontana Sushi, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: Fiona F.
Bag lady: Hey, you guys, can you help me out? I’m really hungry!…You need a dye job, you know! Your roots are showing.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Drew
Woman: So they’re paying the kidnappers child support? I mean I know they want to support their child, but where is the money going? To those crazy people.
–L train
Overheard by: Kelly Marie
