A guy is standing outside the door to a party. A few other people arrive, and the guy says hi to each one. Each one says hi back, except the last one to walk in.
Guy #1: You don’t say hi?
Guy #2: I just nod.
–McKibbin between Bushwick and Seigel
A guy is standing outside the door to a party. A few other people arrive, and the guy says hi to each one. Each one says hi back, except the last one to walk in.
Guy #1: You don’t say hi?
Guy #2: I just nod.
–McKibbin between Bushwick and Seigel
Woman #1: That’s why I don’t go to that church anymore, I don’t want to kick that bitch’s ass in God’s house.
Woman #2: Huh?
Woman #1: Fuck that, I don’t want to go to hell cuz a that bitch, I’d rather fuck her up outside.
–L train, Bedford Ave
Overheard by: HS
Woman on speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, there is an express bound…
[Long pause]
Woman on speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, there is an express bound Manhattan train…oh damnit.
[long pause]
Woman on speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, there is an express bound Manhattan train approaching Nevins Avenue.
Guy: It’s Nevins Street, lady! The stop before that is Atlantic Avenue.
Lady: That person needs to go the fuck back on strike. She went 0 for fucking 3.
–Nevins Street station
Overheard by: Luke
Guy #1: Man, there are so many hipsters around. I hate hipsters!
Guy #2: You’re at the wrong place. That’s like going to Vegas only to say “I hate titties!”
–The Warsaw, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Thiess
Girl: I’m looking for a play for school.
Bookseller: What’s the name?
Girl: Antigen.
Bookseller: You mean Antigone?
Girl: What’s the difference?
Bookseller: One’s a play about a girl and her dead brother, and the other is a play that hasn’t been written yet about carbohydrates and proteins.
Girl: Oh. The dead one, then.
–Barnes & Noble, Court St.
Chick: Why you looking at her? Who is she?
Guy: I don’t know, but she’s sexy as hell.
Chick: Nigga please. She ain’t all that. What she got that I don’t got?
Guy: A pretty face, a nice ass, big tits, a banging body…Need I say more?
–Downtown Brooklyn
Overheard by: The girl they were talking about
Guy: There’s a very large building missing from my neighborhood.
Girl: A building missing, eh? Have you been smoking the dope?
Guy: Yes.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: djlindee
Guy: Yeah, it’s like all three of our neurons are coming together right now.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Phe
Man: What’s the name of that wine? Lan?
Bartender guy: Yep, Lan.
Man: That doesn’t stand for Large Area Network, does it?
Bartender guy: Er, no.
Man: Good.
–Bar Minnow, Park Slope
Overheard by: Armchair Athlete
Teacher guy: You guys know that clock in Union Square that goes
backwards, right?
Teen girl: But why does it change?
–Midwood High School
