Guy: Do you think you’d be able to take a dead fetus on a plane?
Girl: Maybe on a domestic flight.
–Barnard dorm
Overheard by: babs standigio
Guy: Do you think you’d be able to take a dead fetus on a plane?
Girl: Maybe on a domestic flight.
–Barnard dorm
Overheard by: babs standigio
Dude #1: Hey, how do you say ‘brains’ in German?
Dude #2: I don’t know. Why?
Dude #1: I need it for that movie I’m making — ‘Nazi Zombies.’
–Barnes & Noble, 8th & 6th
Teen #1: So, apparently the average human vagina is only 4 inches deep.
Teen #2: No fucking way, dude.
Teen #1: Yeah, so I guess having a huge dick isn’t very helpful in that case.
Teen #2: You hear that? Your eight inches are useless!
Teen #3: Excuse me for having a bigger dick than you.
–F train
Overheard by: mystery man
20-something guy: I’ve never been to a professional sporting event.
Girl: Really?
20-something guy: Well, except for the Orioles…
–Freddy’s Bar, Dean & 6th
Chick: Have you ever read Catch 22?
Guy: Was it written by Dr. Seuss?
Chick: No.
Guy: Then no.
–Pace University
Overheard by: Hugh
Young man: What I’d do is throw a costumed dinner party and have someone killed at the table.
Young girl: Uh-huh.
–Maiden & William St, Financial District
Chick: I hooked up with everyone. I even hooked up with my dealer.
Dude: Yeah, you did.
Chick: But I had to break up — he was too thuggish.
–1 train
Hipster girl, about shoes: Cool, there’s a cow on the side.
Hipster boy: No, it’s a sheep.
Hipster girl: Oh.
Hipster boy: Well, whatever — it’s bovine.
–Beacon’s Closet, Williamsburg
Overheard by: hipster shopper
Guy to girl: I never hooked up when I was blacked out.
Hobo: You never blacked out from liquor?! I’m about to!
–23rd & 2nd
Guy: … And I had a really weird dream last night.
Girl: Oh, yeah? About what?
Guy: Mass murder.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Taking the stairs next time
