Guy on cell: …no, not her. A new chick…Yeah, man, yeah. You know me; I’m anally ambitious. I’m gonna be in her like a gerbil.
–M72 bus
Overheard by: Alexandra
Man #1: So did you get the golden ticket?
Man #2: The what?
Man #1: The golden ticket to the chocolate factory, did you get it?
Man #2: What?
Man #1: Anal! Did you hit her up the butt?
Man #2: Oh! Ha ha…yeah, finally.
–3 Train
Overheard by: Marco Formosa
Guy: Yeah, well, I am going to give her a Valentine’s foot in the ass!
–110th bet. Broadway & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Elena Santogade
A jazz singer was playing his set, and a girl yelled out her phone number. He yelled back: I ain’t gay, but it’s worth a shot.
–55 Bar, Christopher St.
Overheard by: Tyler Shields
Girl: So then I asked everyone, “Who’s ever had anal?” and then he turned around…
–St. John’s University
Overheard by: Megan Cowles
Girl: Cattle? Who said anything about cattle? Now chickens…they’re fun to molest sometimes.
–Fort Greene
Hippiechick: You can’t hug your child with nuclear arms.
–F Train
Overheard by: Erica Bergin
Guy: …it’s like…you can’t hug your child with nuclear arms!
–Bubba Gump’s, Times Square
20-something woman on cell: Did I tell you mom got into a fight with a raccoon again? (pause) Yeah, I know, our mom is totally going to die of rabies.
–Starbucks, West Village
Overheard by: Vaccinated for rabies
Guy to another: Flap your wings baby, just flap your wings!
–Broadway
Woman, shouting at no one in particular: You know I'm unstoppable! I'm like an ox!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
NYU girl: My mother was like, "what would you do with a giant inflatable turkey?" and I was like, "what wouldn't you do with a giant inflatable turkey?"
–3rd Ave & 14th St
Overheard by: Mickey
Guy #1: Wow, [title of show] was awesome. I thought it was super inspirational.
Guy #2: Yeah, the girl-on-girl action was pretty sweet.
Guy #1: And they even had four chairs and a keyboard. How much better does it get?
–Times Square
Overheard by: WonderWoman
Guy, about Empire State Building: Yeah, and for Valentine's Day they put a heart on it.
Visiting Australian woman: A what? A hard-on?
–Rooftop, Watching 4th of July Fireworks
Overheard by: i saw one of those on a building once…
Guy: Dude…did I ever tell you about that time I died?
Friend: What?
–Union Square
Dude #1: We should have stayed in Midtown.
Dude #2: Why? All you can do there is buy socks and drugs.
–Spring & Broadway
Overheard by: Alisa!
