Barely legal girl: Can we do brunch tomorrow?
Guy: Sure.
Barely legal girl: Good. I like having Saturday plans. I get sad on weekends if I don’t wake up in someone else’s bed or have plans.
–51st & 9th
Overheard by: Bar Keep
Barely legal girl: Can we do brunch tomorrow?
Guy: Sure.
Barely legal girl: Good. I like having Saturday plans. I get sad on weekends if I don’t wake up in someone else’s bed or have plans.
–51st & 9th
Overheard by: Bar Keep
Student #1: Yeah, but for Christmas break I'm gonna be in South Carolina.
Student #2: Really? I'm gonna be in North Carolina! Maybe we'll run into each other!
–Classroom, NYU
Attorney: Are there any activities you were able to do prior to the accident that you can no longer do?
Witness: [Inaudible, then] Pong.
Attorney: I’m sorry, did you say, ‘beer pong’?
–Midtown law firm
Overheard by: Amused intern
Chick: What are you doing this weekend?
Guy: I’m going to a passover rave.
Chick: What the hell is a passover rave?
Guy: That’s where we have a Seder, then drop ecstasy and go dancing.
Chick: That is so awesome. Can I come?
Guy: You’re not Jewish.
–Waiting Room, Pacific College of Acupuncture Clinic
Overheard by: Colleen
Hipster boy: He’s such a fucking loser — he just has to admit it. I mean, I’m a loser, and I’m fine with it.
Hipster girl #1: Yeah, it sucks to be a loser and not be cool with him.
Hipster girl #2: I never leave the house anymore.
Hipster boy: Me neither. Last week I bought an antennae for my TV, and sweatpants and weed. I only left the house today because I ran out of milk.
Hipster girl #1: Awesome.
–A train
Suit #1: What are you doing this weekend?
Suit #2: I think I'm going to go jet skiing. Wanna go jet skiing?
Suit #1: Yeah sure, I'll go.
Suit #2 (answers phone): Yeah, I'm going jet skiing this weekend. Do you wanna come? Yeah, I'm going with Steve*. (pause) No, three dudes on a jet ski isn't gay. (turns to friend) Is it?
Suit #1: Two dudes is questionable, but three is definitely gay.
–Broome Street Bar
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #1: … And there’d be football players in the middle of nowhere!
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #2: In December…
Bowl-cut elementary schoolboy #1, in deep, slow voice: In my tummy.
–Central Park South
Overheard by: A. Card
Chick: Excuse me, are the trains running? Because there's one just sitting there…
Station clerk: Nah, they runnin', they runnin'! He just chillin' a little!
–215th Street 1 Station
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Punk girl: So he said he really wants to get me really drunk again.
Punk friend: Why?
Punk girl: Because he said I’m as cute as a Care Bear.
Friend: What the hell does that mean?
Girl: Um, who cares? That’s so sweet… and I didn’t even sleep with him for it. Now help me push up my tits.
–Q Train
Overheard by: Ingss
Chick: I have very, very, very, very little free time. In a week I might have 15 hours, and that includes sleep!
–1st Ave & 9th St.
