Chick #1: We can watch Lackawanna Blues tonight.
Chick #2: I can’t watch another black movie. I watched one last night.
Chick #1: What’d you watch last night?
Chick #2: Hitch.
–Office, Wall & William
Chick #1: We can watch Lackawanna Blues tonight.
Chick #2: I can’t watch another black movie. I watched one last night.
Chick #1: What’d you watch last night?
Chick #2: Hitch.
–Office, Wall & William
Teenage girl #1: I heard something really awkward today, want to hear it?
Teenage girl #2: Okay.
Teenage girl #1: I heard that when you sneeze, you have one-eighth of an orgasm.
Teenage girl #2: Orgasms must be terrible.
–6th Ave
Overheard by: Sunny
Guy #1: What did you say?
Guy #2: What do you think I said? “That ain’t shampoo, it’s maple syrup.”
–1st between 74th & 75th
Overheard by: The Iron Lung
Teen girl on cell: …you just gotta sit him down and say we’re both pregnant by him and we wanna know if we can get along!
–Canal Street
JHS boy: Let’s make like a fetus and head out.
–Broadway & Washington Place
Drunk girl: How could I be pregnant? I like women!
–Times Square
Thug on cell: Nigga, how you been? Shit, I had five kids since I last seen you!
–Elizabeth & Prince
Guy on cell: Do we have to wash you and shave you and put a diaper on you before tonight?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: djlindee
Ghetto girl #1: He was like, ‘I wanna see yo shirt on my bedroom floor’ and I was like, ‘Is this a proposition?’ and he was like, ‘What proposition?’ and I was like, ‘Where’s my ring?’ and he was like, ‘Yo, bitch, I didn’t steal any ring!’ And then he just left.
Ghetto girl #2: I’m gonna say this cause you’re my friend: You’re soooo ghetto.
–Port Authority
Employee: Ma’am, can I help you?
Woman: I’d like a half dozen of your chocolate chip cookies.
Employee: We only sell them, like, 1, 2, 3…
Woman to friend: Is she serious?
Friend: She’ll take 6.
–Starbucks, Rockefeller Center Concourse
Guy: Is that for picket or chain link?
Old man: No, it’s for an Olympic event.
–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Ray Fisher
Man #1: This subway smells like citrus fruit.
Man #2: Yeah, Mr. Lemonhead got killed here.
Woman: I peed on his face once.
–2nd Avenue station
Overheard by: Tourist in Town
High school boy: Superheroes are cool, right?
High school girls: (laughs)
–Governors Island
Overheard by: Brigdh
Girl: Who was she with?
Hairdresser: I’m not, like, racist or anything, but she came with two guys, one was Puerto Rican and one was black!
–Supercuts, 3rd and 32nd
Overheard by: Joe
