Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn’t know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It’s not a burqa, it’s a poncho. I’m Jewish. It’s for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.
–53rd & 7th
Overheard by: Pam
Girl on cell: Ya know, it’s the smart people not having kids, or maybe having one or two. Its the uneducated that are reproducing more uneducated people. You know that 64% of kids born today are minority. We should build that fence bewteen us and Mexico.
–Ray Bari, 56th & 3rd
Very busy person: In class I start saying “African American” and then I’m like, fuck it, and I say “black black black…” I don’t have time to be saying “African American.”
–27th & 10th
Puerto Rican teenager hanging with his homies: Yo GIMME YOUR BIKE!
Hipster riding by on his BMX: Gimme your haircut! I like your crispy hairlines!
–Grand & Havemayer
Overheard by: lil pirate
Middle-aged Italian man #1: I’s a-gonna buy dis pickle. It’s been six months since I hadda pickle. I don’t eat no pickles lately.
Middle-aged Italian man #2: Why not?
Middle-aged Italian man #1: I dunno. Every time it’s like I’m-a suckinacock.
–fruit stand near Hamilton & Columbia, Fort Hamilton
Female lawyer: So what nationality are you?
Male lawyer: Scandinavian.
Female lawyer: Cool…. Where is Scandinavia?
Male lawyer shakes head and walks away.
–1st precinct
Overheard by: crackerjack
Tall Asian teen: That was really funny.
Shorter white teen: Yeah, I’m sorry I keep calling you a fucking Asian.
–Coming out of Avenue Q, 45th & Broadway
Hipster girl #1: Oooh. She’s all Chinese and thinks she’s cute. I hate her.
Hipster girl #2: Actually, she’s Japanese. I’m pretty sure there’s a difference.
Hipster girl #1: Yeah, the price of the food.
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: Amber Lowery
Black guy #1: She wanted to suck my dick watching Sanford and Son at 2AM.
Black guy #2: White niggas don’t understand the principle in that. There ain’t nothing wrong with that.
–2nd & 1st
Overheard by: Errol Stairpath
White girl: Yeah, they’re actually adults. They just look like children because, you know, they’re Asian.
–Asian Pacific American Heritage Festival, Union Square
Overheard by: Kelly
White girl: He really was the smallest black guy I’ve ever fucked…and believe me, I’ve fucked plenty of black guys.
–Union Square
Black guy to Asian woman: We fucking taught you people martial arts! Egypt? What!
–Washington Square Park
Jewish girl to black friend: I want a black boyfriend…what if I turned really ghetto? What if I start to wear baby phat? I’ll be like, this is what Kamal likes. Ohmygod, what if he has his own made-up name? I’ll be like, oh Styx just called me.
–98th & Madison
Overheard by: nathalie
