Woman: Damn, that Mexican is hungry.
Mexican with 10 bags: I’m the delivery boy, you dumb fuck.
–100th & Broadway
Overheard by: robby b
Woman: Damn, that Mexican is hungry.
Mexican with 10 bags: I’m the delivery boy, you dumb fuck.
–100th & Broadway
Overheard by: robby b
White dude: I’m blacker than the fucking poops you shit, son!
–Ditmas Ave
Latina: Shit, where’d all these white people come from?
–Ludlow St
Overheard by: Caroline McGraw
Old black man: Damn son, you ain’t gonna live to be my age if you keep goin’ around callin’ people assholes.
Young punk: Shut the fuck up, old man, I don’t have to listen to you! I’m emancipated!
–S train
Guy #1: I think she’s Mexican.
Guy #2: Nah, she can’t be Mexican, I’ve been there, they cute but short.
Guy #1: Yeah, now that you mention it, she is a little too tall to be Mexican, but I don’t care, I’ll still hit it.
Guy #2: I’ll hit it and help her get her papers if she doesn’t have them. I’m all for amnesty in the name of getting laid.
–JFK Airport
Overheard by: Tydestra, who speaks English
Hipster looking at parade thug boy wearing flag: Oh look, it’s Puerto Rican Superman.
Hipster’s mom: Shhhh! He heard you.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Judy
Man in elevator, to young boy: Como estas?
Wife: That is Spanish. He is from Brazil.
Man: Of, course. So, how do you say “how are you” in Brazilian?
Wife: Meh, they speak Portuguese in Brazil.
Man: Yes, I know that…
Pause
Man: How do you say it in Brazilian?
–109th & Amsterdam
Black girl: Hey white girl, where is the party?
White girl: What? We don’t know.
Hispanic girl #1: Y’all know where all the parties are.
White girl: We are from Cali.
Black and Hispanic girls: Ohhhhh.
Long pause.
Black girl #1: Welcome.
Black girl #2: What the fuck are you, the welcome wagon?
–Times Square
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn’t know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It’s not a burqa, it’s a poncho. I’m Jewish. It’s for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.
–53rd & 7th
Overheard by: Pam
Girl on cell: Ya know, it’s the smart people not having kids, or maybe having one or two. Its the uneducated that are reproducing more uneducated people. You know that 64% of kids born today are minority. We should build that fence bewteen us and Mexico.
–Ray Bari, 56th & 3rd
Very busy person: In class I start saying “African American” and then I’m like, fuck it, and I say “black black black…” I don’t have time to be saying “African American.”
–27th & 10th
Puerto Rican teenager hanging with his homies: Yo GIMME YOUR BIKE!
Hipster riding by on his BMX: Gimme your haircut! I like your crispy hairlines!
–Grand & Havemayer
Overheard by: lil pirate
