College girl to friend: Yeah, my roommate and I had a cute, girly apartment last year… with a fridge full of beer.
Old black guy nearby: Hahahaha.
–Target
Overheard by: alie
College girl to friend: Yeah, my roommate and I had a cute, girly apartment last year… with a fridge full of beer.
Old black guy nearby: Hahahaha.
–Target
Overheard by: alie
Teen #1: Fuck, man. Fuck.. Fuck!
Old black lady: Respect yourself — you better respect yourself.
Teen #2: [Mumbles.]Old black lady: What did you say?! Oh, I thought so. This is why they created more prisons — just for you.
–Q train
Old guy with gray hair: I used to be an old guy with gray hair!
–Mott & Canal St
Overheard by: Will
80-year-old man: What is rough sex? Do I put her against the wall? I don’t know.
–10th & 3rd
Overheard by: Liz
Old lady struggling to get layers of scarves and coats off: I’m not used to having to put clothes on.
–New York Historical Society
Old lady on cell: Old people like sex! I’m 85, and I still like me some sex!
–Port Authority
Overheard by: imerikaf
75-year-old lady to hobo on bench: Oh, wow, you look so cozy!
–Central Park
Old man with cane to 20-ish girl who just nabbed the cab he hailed: Happy holidays, you dumb bitch!
–62nd & 2nd
Old white guy: Fo’ shizzle!
–Outside Nederlander Theatre
20-ish white girl to friends: Guys, sometimes I just feel like the only white girl in the city…
–Fulton St
Overheard by: other white girls
Hobo peering in from sidewalk: Ain’t nothin’ but white people all up in this motherfucker! This shit is racist, yo!
–Garden of Eden, 107th & Broadway
Overheard by: Bubby
Black girl on cell: He fucked a white girl? He fucked a white girl?! How stupid is he? You know if you fuck a white girl you gotta get her consent and then sign a contract!
–PATH platform
Angry black traveler on cell: Do you know how long it takes me to get to JFK from my place?! I’m surrounded by crackers! I. Do. Not. Want. To. Be. Here. Crackers all starin’ at me… I dunno what they’re lookin’ at.
–JFK
Overheard by: Not A Cracker But Staring Anyway
Old white guy at Cirque du Soleil show, to daughter: Is this primarily a white thing? I guess that’s why I don’t like this show. I’ve got too much soul for this.
–Madison Square Garden
Drunk black lesbian: I am not racist in any way. I believe that it’s something that’s taught and passed down from your parents. I am not a racist… but what’s up with white people?!
–D train
Little boy: She’s just a freakin’ cheater. That’s all!
Old lady: Don’t call your mother that.
–79th & 2nd
Old lady, to two-year-old: … And what a sweet little girl you are! [Lady turns to child’s father] It’s nice to see that in this day of child molesters and perverts your daughter isn’t afraid of playing with complete strangers.
Old lady’s old hubby, whispering: Honey, that’s a little boy.
–La Bagel, 15th & 1st
Old man: I may be one of the richest men in the world, but everyone thinks I’m an idiot.
Arm candy: Oh, no! You’re not an idiot. You’re an idiot savant!
–Maloney & Porcelli, 50th St
Overheard by: Jon G.
Old man, with wife: How much is it to Elmont Cemetery?
Car service dispatcher: Will that be one way, or round-trip?
–E 19th St & Ave U, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Arthur
Black guy with clipboard: Anyone? A minute of your time to save the children! Anyone! ‘Scuse me, pretty miss! Excuse me! [Pretty girl ignores him.] Oooh! I’m too flyyy fo’ da children. I’m too hot fo’ da children. [To old lady] Ma’am, do you wanna save the children?
Old lady: I hate children.
–69th & Columbus
Overheard by: Joey
Crusty old man: You aren’t wearing makeup, but you don’t need it. I know, I’m a photographer.
Young woman holding flowers: Thanks.
Crusty old man: I take a long walk once a week to stay in shape. What are the flowers for?
Young woman: My roommate’s birthday.
Crusty old man: My brother’s a pediatrician. His birthday is July fourteenth.
–N train
