Tell Us All about It, Dear

Professor: So, what did you all think of the Bodies Exhibit? Is there any part of the human anatomy you think you’d change if you had the chance?
Hipster guy: I’d get rid of nipples on guys. They’re kind of pointless.
Professor: That’s true. Although some men have very sensitive bosoms and enjoy being touched there. Have any of you ever been with a man who had a sensitive bosom? [One student awkwardly raises her hand.]

–Pratt Institute

Overheard by: traPt

Posted on January 28, 2008
College, Foreplay, Hipsters, Nipples, Questions, Students, Teachers/Professors, Weirdness

She Learned Her Lesson from the “You Kids Like Rape?” Guy

Suit to teen couple: You kids like drugs?
Girl: Um… Is that a trick question?

–Union Square

Headline by: MrCandey

Runners-Up:
· “Because I Only Trick for Cocaine” – ToddS
· “Like “Find America on a Map?” – Krisztina
· “Listen, Are You Getting In This Van Or What?” – gib
· “No, but Speak Closer to My Tie…” – Danny the Mullins
· “Worst Narc Ever” – samson

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Posted on January 28, 2008
Drugs, Girls, Headline Contest Winners, Questions, Suits, Teens, Union Square and East Village

When Worlds Politely Collide

Gangsta #1: You guys have any weed?
White hippie: No, sorry. We have some booze coming soon, though.
Gangsta #2: Booze? What the hell?
Gangsta #1: Drinks, you dumbass… [To hippie] That’s cool, that’s cool.
White hippie: Have a good one!

–Central Park

Overheard by: LSB

Posted on January 28, 2008
Central Park, Drinking & Drunk People, Gangstas, Hippies, Insults, Questions, Thugs, Weed, White People

We Won’t Know Until the Eggs Hatch

Guy #1: … And then I got hit by a car.
Guy #2: Are you a mutant?

–Cafeteria, The New School

Overheard by: katie caroline

Posted on January 26, 2008
Guys, New School, Questions

Aw, Fuck This — Let’s Just Play Strip Candyland Like Usual

Nine-year-old boy: Would you rather be naked in public or in front of a hundred boys? Including me…
Nine-year-old girl: A hundred boys. Would you rather be naked in front of this whole bus or just this back half?
Nine-year-old boy: Just the back half… Wait… You’re in the back half, right?

–M79 crosstown bus, Central Park

Overheard by: Rachel

Posted on January 25, 2008
Kids, Nudity, On the Bus, Questions

While I Listen to Beethoven’s Fifth

Punk chick: So, what do you masturbate to?
Punk singer: What do you mean, what do I masturbate to?
Punk chick: Like, what do you look at?
Punk singer: I guess I look at my dick.

–CBGB

Overheard by: Jimmy Guthrie

Posted on January 25, 2008
CBGB, Masturbation, Punks, Questions

If You Want to Get Thrown to the Rats

Child: Mommy, look! Do you see that rat?!
Mother: Yes.
Child: Oooh, Mommy, look! Do you see that piece of paper?!
Mother: Yes.
Child: Oooh, Mommy! Can I bite you?!
Mother: Yes.

–PATH

Posted on January 21, 2008
Kids, Moms, Questions, Trains Not Subway

To Be Fair, No One Knows Why Bob Saget Has a Career

Little Asian girl: But why?
Mom: I don’t know, honey.
Little Asian girl: But why?
Mom: I just said that I don’t know!
Little Asian girl: But why don’t you know, Mommy?
Mom: Because Mommy’s stupid.

–Central Park

Overheard by: Miranda