Woman: Last month I thought I was in love with you. Now I realize I’m stupid.
Man: Stupid in love?
Woman: No. Just stupid.
–Union Square
Woman: Last month I thought I was in love with you. Now I realize I’m stupid.
Man: Stupid in love?
Woman: No. Just stupid.
–Union Square
Girl: We had this huge fight. It was awful. All the screaming and stuff and public.
Guy: Really? In the street and stuff?
Girl: Yeah. It’s so embarassing.
Guy: Wow. You’ll probably end up on that Overheard site.
–Madison Square Garden
Overheard by: Waiting in Line
Guy #1: I shouldn’t even pay rent in my house, I’m out so much. I should be homeless; I’m barely ever there.
Guy #2: You could live at the ASPCA!
Guy #1: Yeah, the ASPCA. It’s a good place to live. My ex-girlfriends live there.
–Staten Island Ferry Terminal, Staten Island
Overheard by: Barnaby McSwooptang
Hipster guy: I need a woman to love me so I can alienate her. The love part, that’s where it gets difficult.
Girl #1: Oh, come on. It’s so easy to find a needy bitch.
Girl #2: Have you tried AA?
–Astoria
Man #1: Honey, we don’t have to see Memoirs of a Geisha. You lived it, didn’t you?
Woman: You just know the right things to say!
Man #2: Some people make me wish that snow outside was really acid.
–Loews 42nd Street
Woman: It’s going to be a 20 minute wait.
Man: Why don’t you go use the restrooms now?
Woman: It’s okay, I can wait 20 minutes.
Man: If you shit your pants in public again, I’m going to fucking kill
you.
–Veselka, 2nd Avenue
Guy #1: Dude, why are you texting my girlfriend?
Guy #2: She texted me.
Guy #1: I am going to call the whore right now.
–Lincoln Park, 9th Avenue
Overheard by: Mike DeVito
Girl #1: So, I’ve been thinking, I think I could be a lesbian. You know, get really really close with a girl. But I don’t think I would want to hook up!
Girl #2: So…kinda like friends?
Girl #1: Oh yeah. I guess so.
Girl #3: So does that make us all lesbians?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Zoe Valen
Drunk woman: They’re married, those two are together, you and I are alone and it sucks, so get over it!
–Carmine’s, West 44th Street
Overheard by: Emily
Jessica Cutler: Twelve of my last sixteen boyfriends were Jewish.
–Happy Ending, Broome Street
