Nerdy teen: Dude, I really want to see what Lord Voldemort looks like in the movie.
Friend: Yeah, man. I really want to see Lord Voldemort get naked.
Nerdy teen: Oh, yeah. Me, t– What?
–Borders
Nerdy teen: Dude, I really want to see what Lord Voldemort looks like in the movie.
Friend: Yeah, man. I really want to see Lord Voldemort get naked.
Nerdy teen: Oh, yeah. Me, t– What?
–Borders
Girl: I always thought those things were called life-savers!
–UA movie theater, Union Square
Overheard by: braun bowery
Friendly old lady: Did you see the way your dog greeted me outside? Stood right up on its hind legs to say hello! Such a sweet animal!
Middle-aged computer geek: Yes, he likes to socialize. I’m working. Enjoy.
–Starbucks, Broadway & 70th St
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Yuppie: I was just teaching the scientific method to my students.
Nerd: Oh, so you teach them induction and deduction?
Yuppie: [long pause] The students aren’t that smart so I don’t teach them big words like those.
— Party, Manhattan
Nerdy, middle-aged Jewish man: Um, you’re dripping on me.
Middle-aged jock: No, I’m not.
Nerdy, middle-aged Jewish man: Yes, it’s from your windbreaker.
Middle-aged jock: You moron. You fucking moron.
–1 train, UWS
Overheard by: Beth
Big black man: It’s ok, I’m not a gangsta!
Nerdy white kid: Neither am I!
–Times Square
Nerd #1: From the way you talk about LISP, I think you went to MIT. Did you?
Nerd #2: Yes, I did!
— Union Square Park
Bag check guy: I want your bag.
Comic book chick: Pardon?
Bag check guy: You know the rules. Give me your bag.
Comic book chick: Sorry, I didn’t know I had to check this.
Bag check guy: What did you think, that I’m just some crazy black man sitting up here harassing people?
Comic book chick: Could be.
Bag check guy: That’s true.
–Forbidden Planet, 13th Street
Asian nerd #1: Neutrons!
Asian nerd #2: … Subatomic particles!
Asian nerd #3: Velocity times speed equals… Power! [all start cheering and high-fiving one another.]
–Park Ave & 23rd St
Overheard by: …not very science-y
Frat boys shouting: Voldemort! Voldemort!
Gryffindor girl to friend: If that fucking Slytherin reads the last page aloud to me, I swear I’m going to shove this fucking wand up his nose!
–Harry Potter Midnight Madness Party, Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: Pat Miller
