Girl: That Susan’s such a whore.
Guy: Yeah, but wouldn’t you be?
Girl: What?
Guy: You know, hypothetically, if you could get people to sleep with you.
–11th & C
Girl: That Susan’s such a whore.
Guy: Yeah, but wouldn’t you be?
Girl: What?
Guy: You know, hypothetically, if you could get people to sleep with you.
–11th & C
Girl #1: Wow, you got your nose pierced!
Girl #2: Yeah, I got it yesterday
Girl #1: How did they do it? Gun or needle?
Girl #2: Gun.
Girl #1: Ah ok, how do they fit a gun up there?
–McDonalds
Overheard by: Ness
Ghetto girl #1: Yo, he better treat me better than that. I’m talking roses, bling, Red Lobster…
Ghetto girl #2: Girl that’s so true, I’m puttin’ that on my Myspace.
–Union Square
Overheard by: D. P.S.
Guy: I can’t believe he’s gone. He was such a good man.
Girl: I know, I feel so bad for Susan.
Older woman: I know, poor Susan. He was everything to her.
Older man: I know, what a wonderful guy he was. I remember that party we all went to, he had so much fun. [Whispering to older woman] Who are we here to see again?
–Funeral Home, Queens
Overheard by: Glad I’m not Susan
Guy: He’s kind of cute.
Girl: No he’s not, I do not approve.
Guy: Whatever, I think he’s a really interesting person.
Girl: Of course he’s interesting. He’s addicted to coke and he’s a gay porn star and we know all of this about him and we’ve only known him for 5 minutes.
–no idea bar 20th St & 5th Ave
Rhodes Scholar wigger: Yeah, we ain’t together no more. Bitch had the nerve to dump me.
Friend: What happened? You guys looked fine last week. It doesn’t make sense.
Rhodes Scholar wigger: She wasn’t down with how I roll. Always dissin’ the way I talk and shit–you know, correcting me and shit. Said she couldn’t take it no more, that I was always actin’ ign-i-ant or some shit. Like she’s some brain scientist or some shit. Bitch was always wrong anyways.
Friend: Brain surgeon.
Rhodes Scholar wigger: What?
Friend: You said brain scientist. I think you meant brain surgeon.
Rhodes Scholar wigger: Dat’s what I said nigga, you just heard me wrong.
Friend: You know what, suddenly it does makes sense.
–Manhattan bound F train
Overheard by: SandmanEsq
Guy: I’m gonna go take a shower.
Girl #1: Yeah, I want to take a shower, too.
Girl #2: Oooh! Me, too!
Girl #1: Let’s take a joint shower!
–2 train
Overheard by: already showered
Girl #1: Can you believe that my boyfriend is still mad at me for that?
Girl #2: Jeez, who knew that throwing an orange at someone’s head can change the whole dynamic of a relationship.
–8th & Broadway
Overheard by: Jess
Guy #1: So my roommate keeps kosher.
Guy #2: Dude, that’s awesome.
Guy #1: Why is that awesome?
Friend: ‘Cause you now have intricate, firsthand knowledge of the best pastrami sandwiches this side of Park. In fact, I think you should call him right now. I want a knish.
–6 train
Overheard by: Not to mention the best lawyers, doctors, sch
Girl: He’s way too intense for me.
Guy: How so?
Girl: He likes poetry, and his MySpace page is totally black and stuff.
–Chinatown Brasserie, Lafayette St
