Quasi-thug #1: So if I got the first season, you would watch it with me?
Quasi-thug #2: Fuck yeah. It’s the fucking Golden Girls, yo.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: djlindee
Quasi-thug #1: So if I got the first season, you would watch it with me?
Quasi-thug #2: Fuck yeah. It’s the fucking Golden Girls, yo.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: djlindee
Girl: I did, I saw Uma Thurman in Les Mis.
Guy: She wasn’t in Les Mis.
Girl: Not on stage, on TV.
Guy: She wasn’t in Les Mis on TV.
Girl: I thought it was her, or someone else with that cross-eyed look.
–42nd & 8th
Kid: Excuse me, can you get Floyd to sign something for me?
Security guard: No. Floyd hates kids.
–Shea Stadium
Overheard by: Silent K
Singing hobo: Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip —
Girl with a lot of rage: Shut the fuck up! I hate that fucking show. Gilligan’s Island. Fuck you, man.
–Union Square
Teenie girl: Omigod! Idea! Do you want to go rent a movie?
Her much older boyfriend: Sure. Have you seen The Firm?
Teenie girl: What is that, like a porno?
–Hershey store, Times Square
Overheard by: Just wanted some gummy bears
Lady on train: What are you watching?
Overexcited man with portable DVD: The Da Vinci Code.
Lady: Oh! Cool! Is it good?
Overexcited man: It’s EXCELLENT!
Lady: Oh — I heard from people that the book was better.
Lady’s friend: That’s bullshit. She doesn’t read.
–Penn Station, LIRR
Overheard by: Jordo VB
Man with facial hair: You can only really pull off a Fu Man Chu if you’re a cop, a gay porn star, or a pirate.
–Virgin Records, Times Square
Guy to his girlfriend: You are one hairy bastard
–78th & 1st
Suit to other suit: They drive it through the city in milk trucks so that no one will know.
–6th between 55th & 56th
Overheard by: Ann M. Hetzel
Queer on cell: Sunday? Well, I hate to say this out loud on a cell phone where the authorities can hear, but. . . that’s Tonys night.
–Broadway & 33rd, Astoria
Overheard by: lily carver
Guy: I went to high school with you. I was a senior when you were a freshman. I used to look at your pantylines in gym class.
–Kevin St. James, 46th & 8th
Very old lady to husband: You asshole! YOU ASSHOLE! I hate you.
Old husband: Wha?
Old lady: You didn’t wait for me, you fucking asshole.
–Clearview Cinemas, 62nd & 1st
Eva Amurri to hipster companion: My father was telling me the dangers of aspartame — you know the stuff in Diet Coke? It’s like a sugar. It was once registered as a chemical weapon.
Hipster companion: Yeah?
Eva Amurri: If there is any way to become a superhero, it has to be by drinking Diet Coke.
[later]
Eva Amurri to hipster companion: I can’t remember how it ends… If he dies in a war or if Gatsby gets in a car crash, but he loves Daisy.
[later still]
Eva Amurri: Pasties are Band-Aids that only cover your nipples.
–Acela train leaving Penn Station
Overheard by: could you maybe namedrop your mom less, Miss Top-Volume-At-All-Times?
